Like any self-respecting Jesuit school, Georgetown University provides its students with a week off to celebrate the holy week of Easter. Most students venture home to the land of free food and mothers to do their laundry, but this break, I decided to do something adventurous. I wanted to discover new foods and experience new cultures, so for my Easter break I made the courageous decision to travel to the far-off land known to locals as New England.
Now, as a native Coloradan, I know what it’s like to be stereotyped based on where I’m from. No, I don’t ski to school. Yes, we actually do have electricity. No, I don’t live in a Western trading post. And yes, there are more than three people within state limits (barely). So after experiencing three days of all that New England has to offer, I present to you 10 things I was surprised to learn on my first New England vacation.
1. Why did the teenager at Ben and Jerry’s ask me if I wanted jimmies on my ice cream cone when he clearly meant rainbow sprinkles?
2. Why do you need a Dunkin’ Donuts on every block? And why does there need to be one on each side of the road?
3. Why did I hear a little girl tell her friend she would race her to the bubbler, and then run directly for what is clearly called a drinking fountain?
4. Why has this entire region forgotten that the letter R exists?
Park the car at Harvard yard should not become Pahk the cah at Hahvahd yahd.
5. Why has New Hampshire forgotten that sales tax is a thing? And why hasn’t the rest of the country followed suit?
6. Why can I drive for 30 minutes and say that I’ve visited three separate states?
7. Why exactly is it called New England?
This is not 1776. We are no longer the colonies. WE ARE NOT PART OF ENGLAND ANYMORE.
8. Why have I never received so many death glares as when I asked if New York is part of New England?
They can't be that different. They both start with "New."
9. Why do people drive like the four horsemen of the apocalypse are chasing them?
10. And why, why did we go to church on Easter Sunday and pray to Tom Brady instead of God?
But even though they make up words, and talk really funny, and follow a not-quite-as-good football team, what can I say? All in all, my three-day New England vacation was wicked cool.
