While getting back into the logistics of the new school year at West Chester University, I realize that I am particularly excited for its kickoff. This specific eagerness holds one underlying reason that has made me take a step back and reevaluate my priorities. This reason is that I, Darby McKee, have an addiction to Einstein Brothers Bagels. Yes, that’s right ladies and gents, I am in love! Yes, it is a serious problem and no, I am not ashamed of it. If you are anything like me, you may have realized some indicators by now of your own infatuation. So, if you aren’t certain where you stand, here are 10 sure signs that you are addicted to Einstein’s.
- John Greets You By Name Now. Anyone who is an Einstein’s fan knows John, most commonly referred as “the bagel guy.” You know, the guy who brightens up your morning by saying “Good morning mum! What can I get for you today?” Once you get hooked on this place, you will discover that you will no longer play the “Give me the first letter - How many? - What does it rhyme with” game anymore. Now, John greets you by name, knows your order, and genuinely wishes that you have a good day.
2. Thinking About The Muffins Make Your Mouth Water. Admit it. You have totally done a double take at the muffin case at this point. Maybe you have even done a triple take. As you read the labels: “Blueberry, Chocolate, Pumpkin-Frosted, and Cinnamon” you have convinced yourself that you needed to get one. I mean it would be wrong if you didn’t…right? No shame. No shame in that at all.
3. You Have Used Up All Of Your Meals...Way Before The End Of The Week. Spending two meals on an Einstein’s trip has become a regular occurrence to you. Actually, keeping track of how many meals you have left has given you anxiety. By the end of the week, you shamefully look down when you come to the cash register. You’re only hope is that you can say “Two meals please” instead of being confronted with the fact that your meal has to be put entirely on Flex.
4. You Feel Wrong On A Spiritual Level When You Turn Your Back On Your Order. Whether it be a bacon, egg, and cheese bagel, or a sesame bagel with egg whites and mozzarella cheese, or any other wonderful creation off the menu, you have your order down pat. By this stage of the game, you have perfected your order to a point where there is no return. In your eyes, there is nothing greater.
5. And You Have A Slight Panic Attack On The Day You Decide To Switch Your Order. Rarely, you will have those days when you have wondered, “Maybe I should switch it up…” The other items on the menu somehow spark your curiosity. As you edge up closer and closer to John, the endless possibilities of perfectly toasted flavors streams through your mind. However, when it gets to be your turn, you chicken out and order your usual anyway.
6. It Feels Like You’re In The Hunger Games When You Want To Get Strawberries. Have you sped past people to get your chance at that whip cream, chocolate syrup, fruit filled cup? Have you woken up early just to get your hands on it? If you answered yes to those questions, then you have been caught red-handed (literally). You would probably shed blood, sweat, and tears for those strawberries.
and snow flurries haven’t been able to stop you from your trip towards Einstein’s. Once you had gotten your hands on that bagel bag and coffee cup, you knew it was totally worth the trek. If you weren’t sure, your feelings were solidified at least one time by the jealous stares of your classmates. Despite the attention, you just put on those hater blockers and devoured your perfectly warm bagel.
8. You have used the wait in line as your “catch up” time between friends. The high quality of the food at Einstein’s is irrefutable….along with the amount of time you have to wait for it. However, if you are addicted to Einstein’s, you now expect the pro-longed wait in a line that wraps around Larry’s Market….and you are aren’t nearly as bitter as you were before because of it. By now, you have used this time to catch up with your friends in line about what happened at the party or class you missed. Nine times out of 10, these conversations helped the time to fly.
9. You Take Personal Offense When Someone Wants To Go To Lawrence Instead Of Einstein’s. You literally cringe at the thought of someone comparing stale Lawrence bagels to goldenly toasted and shmeared Einstein bagels. There is really no comparison to be made. If there was, Einstein’s would win every time.
10. It Makes Your Day. A huge reason for your undeniable love of Einstein’s is the undeniable love from the Einstein employees. From singing the songs on the radio, complimenting you on your smile, or just by having a friendly conversation, the workers have always made you feel at home on campus. When it comes down to it, you know you can always count on Einstein's to make your day.
