"The most terrible poverty is loneliness and the feeling of being unloved." - Mother Teresa
It seems as though we are often told that our problems are too small. Too small to be considered an actual problem and too small to be cared about. We are often told that because others are suffering from something more visible, our troubles cannot possibly compare. I don't think that's fair. I don't think it's fair to compare hurt. I don't think it's fair to choose who we are allowed to be sympathetic towards or who we're supposed to put first. Although it may be true that someone in another place is hurting badly, people are always hurting - it doesn't mean that our emotions and our hurt doesn't count. It doesn't mean feeling lonely isn't a reason to cry. It doesn't mean depression isn't a serious issue. It doesn't mean anxiety isn't painful. Most of all, it definitely doesn't mean having these problems makes us weak. Wanting to be loved and happy isn't something to be ashamed about.
By saying that emotions and feeling afraid isn't a real reason to be sad, we are asking people to suffer alone. Repetitively telling people that their struggles are selfish makes them afraid of asking for help. It means that those who are most fearful of being unloved and alone, feel as those they truly are.
To be honest, it seems like a rather simple concept: be there for whoever needs it. Sadly, many don't see things as simple as this anymore. Something as easy as being kind to anyone who needs help has become about comparing pain and undermining emotions. It has become about isolation and separation and categorizing agony into what each individual feels is most real. People are arguing about whether bullying is a real issue when all that needs to be done is helping whoever was the victim. People are fighting about whether physical illness is more serious that mental ones when all that needs to be done is to heal and support those who need it. Life is already filled with pain, it needs more love not more anger.
As a society we need to be more supportive. We need to realize that no matter how small something may seem to us, we never genuinely know how much it impacts someone else. We never really know how someone is feeling. We don't know what they do when they're alone, how they feel at their very worst, or how long they've been suffering. The only thing we know is that everyone is going through something different, and everyone has the ability to help. We all have the chance to tell a person that they aren't alone. We can easily stop someone from feeling small or frightened, even just for a second. I think that's a beautiful thing.
