Hello,
I'm glad you got to read this, I was hoping it would find it's way to you. I bet you did not expect me to write this, I bet you thought I was still scared or that I didn't have the courage to write this. You were right, a few times, I did not have the courage to, I was scared, I did not know what to say other than bitter words and crude things.
It has been almost a year and the thought of you becomes dimmer and dimmer. I cannot remember the way your hands felt, your voice is a low whisper and your mean comments are something of the past. I am not here to bash you and tell you that you were probably one of the worst things to happen to me, no, I am here to tell you, you were one of my best things that happened to me, weird huh? Yeah, I didn't think so at first either, but let me explain.
Because of you, I gained a lot of weight, I lost my confidence and my identity as a teenage girl. But also because of you, I have learned to lose weight but in a way I feel happy, I am more confident as ever and I have found my identity as a woman. I no longer look in a mirror and want to cry and hide myself away, I do not have to put on pounds of makeup because you wanted me too and told me it was because I looked "better" that way.
Because of you I never thought I could be loved again because I was "fat" and "ugly". Because of you, I have found a man who is more than kind to me, you don't like that do you? Better yet, he doesn't try to control me and belittle me in front of his friends, he doesn't make me nervous to sit next to him or flinch when he moves. He calls me beautiful and showers me in his love. Makes you angry, doesn't it? Good. It should, you don't get to control me and I know that must grind your gears. Because of you, I have found love, from not only him, his friends and his family. Something I never felt with you.
My hate for you is gone, my dislike for your actions is disappearing. I only have positive thoughts and words for you now.
To the girl you will eventually or already are with, treat her better. Make her feel beautiful and do not try to control her. Let her feel welcomed in your arms and your family. Treat her with respect and allow her to be her own person as well.
Good luck in school, I hope you will find your career path that will make you happy in life.
Tell your car, she looks nice when I see her around school. I like the work you have done to her, but she is still not a race car.
Tell your mother that I hope she is doing well and that her health is improving. Give your father my well wishes as well.
To you, I hope you find your happiness and will not be so bitter forever.
From,
The Girl You Tried to Break.
