I live my life trying to be the positive person all my friends come to when they need someone to talk to, when they need some to lend them an open ear. I try to put on this strong look like I have it all together but sadly I'm nowhere close to where I want or need to be in life. I struggle more than you know with anxiety, some days I'll wake up and have a really negative thought pop into my head. I'll spend the whole day consumed with that thought and most of the time it's really stupid to even think, but that's anxiety for you.

For example, I worried for a good 3 hours at work the other night that I wouldn't be able to get off work in time to make it to Chick-fil-a before they closed, and was scared that someone didn't text me back within 20 minutes so they must hate me now. I've been consumed with worry for a good portion of my life, until recently when I decided to let go of the things I have no control over and just do the best I can in life. Loving others, pushing forward and trying to keep a smile on my face constantly, even though sometimes that's easier said than done.

For those of you who don't know me I'm in school for film and my goal in that field of life is to write and direct a film that changes someones life in a positive way. A film that truly makes you stop and think that life isn't a waste of time and neither is loving others. For years I've wanted to make a film that is based around that concept and even though I've been lacking motivation lately, that script is getting done sooner rather than later.

A few months ago I almost threw all those hopes and dreams away because I let myself get to the lowest point I had ever been in my life. I looked at myself in the mirror one day and thought if life was really worth all the hurt and heartache. Let me be the first to tell you; YES it is worth it all. You are worth it all! There is a light at the end of the dark tunnel that we sometimes travel through.

I was so worried about the what ifs that I lost sight of myself and why I was pursuing a career in film. I got to a point where I couldn't do it anymore and I decided to go home. I got in my car and drove to Virginia. After I got there I went to the doctor for a checkup and had blood drawn. The man who drew my blood literally saved my life and made me see clearly; it was as if God had put this man in my path to show me the plans He had for me, and I believe that very thing.

While drawing my blood the man started talking to me, "Do you want the big needle or the small needle?" I replied "The small one."

"You don't get to choose, there's only one size son!" the man said as he laughed. He brightened my day with his humor and attitude. He told me to clench my fist so he could find a good vein to pull the blood from, saying "You know, its pretty funny. If I pulled the blood from your arm right now with your fist clinched tight then it would hurt worse than if you just relaxed through it."

He continued on to say that life works the same way; if we were to walk through life with all this weight on our shoulders, or if we are uptight all the time with worrying about tomorrow rather than focusing on the joy of today, then life will hurt more. But if we learn how to just relax as we walk through life then it will be much easier.

When he was finished he smiled and said "Take care my brother." When I walked out of the doctors office that day I learned something very valuable; we’re not supposed to know what our next breath has in store, but that’s what makes every breath special. If we knew what our next breath had in store then we would take our current breath for granted.

Life is tough but so are you. Keep fighting. You are loved.

Your Life Has Value.