I lived in a sweet, blissful innocence for 17 years of my life. I lived in a world where I believed that I could do absolutely anything I wanted, be anything I wanted to be. I thought that I lived in a world where all men and boys respected women and treated them as equals. I was 17 when that innocence fell down around me. I was catcalled for the first time, and my friends and I learned that some men will stop at nothing to get what they want from women. We grew up way too fast. At 17, I learned that to be a woman was to be treated as less, to be objectified, to be afraid.
I love hearing the stories of survivors of violence and sexual assault. These women are stronger than I. The encouragement from strong women to other strong women on social media inspires me every day. It's taken me two years to get back into the mentality that I can do whatever I want to do. The only difference is that I will have to work a lot harder than my male counterparts on almost every front.
To be a woman is to work harder than all the men in your field just to get the same recognition and pay they do.
Make no mistake, the wage gap is real and sexism in the workplace is alive and well. A professor of mine recently shared statistics of what people were willing to pay female scientists versus what those same people were willing to pay male scientists. The only difference in the applications was the name on the file, female or male. The consensus, from both male and female employers, was that they would be willing to pay the male applicant twice as much as the female applicant. Do not tell me that the wage gap isn't real, it most certainly is. As a white woman, I am in a much better position than women of color — they get paid even less than white women.
To be a woman is to be afraid as you walk down the street, to your car, and to your house or dorm.
Rape anxiety is so real. I can't tell you how many times I have been scared of a man who is walking towards me in the dark, or even in broad daylight. Of course, I know that not all men are even capable of rape, but the ones that are, terrify me day and night. I don't feel safe outside after 8 p.,m., whether I am alone or with friends. This anxiety is in no way the man's fault and there is not much anyone can do to relieve it. The only way to change this is to send a message via the Brock Turners of the world. If the victim blaming would stop and the perpetrators would actually be sentenced to a punishment that actually fits their crimes (not six months for sexual assault), women would find comfort in knowing that the police and government will protect them. A word on victim blaming: It doesn't matter if the woman is wearing a burka or if she's completely naked, she is never asking for it and she never deserves it.
To be a woman is to be ridiculed for your appearance.
If you don't wear makeup, you're sloppy. If you do wear makeup, you're trashy. If you cover up, you're a prude. If you show some skin, you're a slut. It seems like women can't do anything without being evaluated and critiqued by men, and by extension, other women. Just for everyone's information, people can wear whatever they want and it has absolutely no effect on your life or anyone else's. For people shaming high school girls for short shorts, low cut shirts, and crop tops, ask yourself why you care. If your answer, like many schools', is that it would distract the boys from their schoolwork, ask yourself what the real problem is. Is it the midriff? Or is it the fact that teachers and parents are under the impression that boys can't control their impulses?
To be a woman is to be strong, intelligent and unstoppable.
Women have been through a hell of a lot since the 19th century. I will never forget the women who have gotten this gender to where we are now. I have people like Elizabeth Cady Stanton, Rosa Parks, Marie Currie and Hillary Clinton to thank for the rights that I have now. We are strong and we always have been. We are intelligent and we always have been. We are unstoppable and we always have been. It's important to recognize how far we have come, however, it's critical that we realize that there is so much work left to be done. So I will continue this ongoing fight. I will continue until every woman can pursue her dreams, until women can walk the streets without fear, until women can wear whatever they want without being catcalled or hearing the words "well did you see how she was dressed?".
Women have proven time and time again that there is little that can deter them from this cause. We've been knocked down more times than anyone could imagine.
"Nevertheless, she persisted."
