People that say you can't "win" a white elephant gift exchange are liars. Gift exchanges are meant for large groups of people who want to show appreciation without buying gifts for 50 different people. Great idea. It's a big mess of fighting over presents but everyone leaves with a gift so everyone's happy. So, if your families or friends are anything like mine, you've probably participated in something similar, but for those of you who don't know what "white elephant" is, I'm about to give you a run down of the real rules. Then I'll teach you how to win.
Rule #1: Each player brings one wrapped gift to contribute to a common pool.
The issue here is what gift to bring. Women don't always want the same things. You should take wine. Or maybe you shouldn't, not all women have the same taste in wine. Not all women want womanly gifts. What if it's a mixed gender party? Do you bring a unisex gift? What is a unisex gift?
How to win:
Bring something you want. In theory it'll be something up-to-date and relatively trendy so it should be a hit.
Or maybe no one will want it and you'll leave with your own present...
*Shrugs* Oops.
Rule #2: Players draw numbers to determine what order they will go in.
You really don't want to fall in the middle here. But it's tricky. If you go first, you'll get a chance at the end to change the game, and if you go last you have the same freedom, assuming things haven't been traded too many times and are still on the board. But in the middle you're stuck with not knowing if you should steal or open a new gift... But we'll get to all that.
How to win:
Draw your number early and pray you got a good one. If your family and friends are cool and suave, you might even have the luxury of offering incentive for a number trade.
Rule #3: The first player selects a gift from the pool and opens it.
How to win:
Okay honestly, you can't win at this one unless you are the first person to open... But I guess if you are, open small presents. Small presents mean either cash, gift cards or socks, all of which are better gifts than the candle set your aunt contributed.
Rule #4: The following players can choose to either pick an unwrapped gift from the pool or steal a previous players' gift. Anyone who gets their gift stolen in this way can do the same — choose a new gift or steal from someone else.
Here's where it gets tricky. If you take anything away from this article, it should be this tip...
How to win:
Team up. The easiest way for you to bring home exactly what you want is to form an alliance with other players. Hopefully, the two or three other members of your "team" are spread out in the present lineup. Each member should locate something on the board that they ideally want to end up with and that should be communicated within the team.
Side note: Yes, this is cheating.
Rule #5: After all players have had a turn, the first player gets a chance to swap the gift they're holding for any other opened gift. Anyone who’s gift is stolen may steal from someone else and when someone declines to steal a gift, the game comes to an end.
How to win:
Within your team, you'll have the opportunity to steal from other people to get the items you and your partners want and freeze the item (after a gift is stolen twice, it is no longer in play and that person owns it). Then you walk outside and trade each other for the gifts you want and viola! You won Christmas.
Obviously I couldn't share my secrets before this Christmas or everyone would know exactly how I always get what I want... But next year, throw down your best poker face, form some alliances, and go win that Chinese gift exchange for yourself.
