Living with a roommate is one thing, but if you’re single and you decide to live with a couple, you have just killed the possibility of any sort of peace and happiness in your own living space. Living with a couple while single can be depressing, annoying, fun (in rare cases), a learning experience, and an even worst idea than grabbing drinks with Bill Cosby or walking past dumpsters with Brock Turner. When you live with a couple, you will experience a variety of things. Here are just a few of them.
1.Can you get a room? Wait, not that room!
Being single for a long period of time or just fresh out of a relationship, changes your views of relationships. You have convinced yourself that relationships suck and you want no parts of it, therefore making your negative reaction to them amplified. Trust me, nothing is more annoying than watching your roommate couple go from 0-100 over something as little as a bottle of water (yeah, I know) and arguing for the next few hours. You go in your room to escape the real-life Jersey Shore re-run of Ronnie and Sammy, but you can still hear everything. “Damn, all they do is argue!” After every swear word in the book is said at the top of their lungs, there is a brief moment of calm. The “calm” is bad, because the storm is coming. You finally leave your room for a snack, only to walk into your living room to see a hole in the wall, broken glass, and clothes…everywhere. You would think it couldn’t get any worse or confusing; that is until you have to use the bathroom and realize those loud moans aren’t coming from your laptop with the open Pornhub tab. There is one bathroom in the apartment.
2.Picking Sides
There is no doubt that this issue will arise while living with a couple as a roommate. Day after day you will hear their relationships problems as they expect you to take their side and agree that the other is being a douchebag or c-word. Believe me, you want no part in picking sides when living with a couple. They tend to bring it up in their next argument and involve you in it, “Really, well Mar’kee agrees with me. Right Mar’kee?” … “Actually guys I was just leaving, I have to go do something, very far away from you two.” Picking sides can be a death wish during a break-up. There is almost no avoiding the question, “Between the both of us, who would you rather stay?” There is absolutely no reason you should even attempt to answer this, it will most likely end badly.
3.What’s Privacy?
Having privacy in your own living space is an essential part of why you no longer live with your parents. Living with a couple, though, is kind of like living with your parents. They are usually only in their bedroom together at night, if one is gone the other seems to be home all the time, it feels like you definitely can’t walk around naked and an even slimmer chance of you living your dream of pooping with the door open. Not to mention the fact that if you bring home a girl, they automatically insist on double dating… all the time. Furthermore, you feel the need to vent sometimes about one of them, to the other one in hopes they will keep it to themselves as they promise to do. However, as soon as they see their significant other, their mouth gets bigger than Gretchen Wieners in Mean Girls.
Living with a couple as a roommate is the last thing you should consider when looking to get an apartment of your own. There are so many problems that come with this kind of living situation (way more than the three I gave you); Plain and simple, you will most likely be counting down the days until your lease is up.
