I recently got the opportunity to hang out with a lot of middle school girls. The conversations they had constantly interested me, and it was overall a great time except for one thing. I started to notice a trend in the way they talked. Anytime the conversation hit a negative point, one would chime in with “me.” I’m just as guilty as they are of excessively saying the word, but something struck me differently this time. I became aware that I along with these girls (and many, many more in our society) often compare ourselves to things of little value.

The idea of saying “me” as a comparison to something is heartbreaking, and the underlying issue is that it emphasizes on the idea that your life sucks as much as the thing you’re comparing yourself to. It’s a sad thing to say but it’s completely true. Nowadays, it’s so common to walk by a trashcan or see something fall of the desk and say “me.” If you look at the big picture, you’re now saying that the beautiful creation whom you are is equivalent to an item that holds stinky leftovers or an item that lacks stability. The possibilities of comparison are endless.

It’s a trend that seems completely harmless, but it’s something women should become more aware of. I’m talking about women using this phrase because it’s more common for us to use, but I’m by no means doubting that some men use it as well. Regardless of who says this, everyone is encouraged to think about themselves and others positively. Whenever people’s conversations begin to be filled with this one-lined, pessimistic phrase it becomes more difficult to share something enlightening or cheerful. The big deal about it is that we’re failing to support the idea of positivity when we use this phrase, and it’s especially crucial whenever you look at the alarming statistic that over 70% of school-aged girls struggle with insecurity. Whenever you’re making these awful comparisons about who you are and how you look you’re only feeding into the issue of not feeling and looking good enough. This phrase gives a whole new meaning to what Proverbs 15:4 talks about when it says “a deceitful tongue crushes the spirit.” It’s so crucial, especially as young adults, to build on another up in the way we talk to and about one another; this even means even how we talk about ourselves.