"Forgiveness is not always easy. At times, it feels more painful than the wound we suffered, to forgive the one that inflicted it. And yet, there is no peace without forgiveness."- Marianne Williamsom
Forgiveness is tricky and it can be one of the hardest things to do, especially when we feel wronged. However, forgiveness can offer you so much. I'm not going to tell you to "forgive and forget," because I know that forgiving isn't necessarily forgetting. You can forgive someone for what they've done to you without forgetting it happened, and in some ways, I think this can make the forgiveness a little more powerful. To be able to look at someone who has hurt you and not hold a grudge against them- to know that they treated you poorly, yet you still have the ability to let it go and not have any ill feelings towards them and be kind to them, in a pure way, not in a "kill them with kindness" or "I'm going to prove I'm the bigger person" kind of way, but in the purest sense of the word kind of way, says so much about someone's character.
Forgiveness is a gift you can give yourself (and there's no guilt from splurging afterward). Some may say that forgiving someone is the equivalent of letting them get away with it or letting them off the hook, but I disagree. You're doing yourself a favor. It's something you can do for yourself in order to help yourself be happy and find peace. It's not something you're necessarily doing for them, but instead, you're relieving yourself of the burden of hurt and anger, which is a big deal because resentment can be one of the heaviest loads to carry.
Gandhi once said, “The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.” Resentment is a child's game. Letting it go is an unbelievable source of strength. We don't forgive because we are weak, we forgive because we have the strength to realize that resentment is petty and that the best way to move on and grow is to let it go.
Ultimately, forgiveness is a form of self-love. We all desire peace in our lives and forgiveness is one of the best ways to obtain it. We should love ourselves enough to remove anything toxic in our life and to liberate ourselves from any grudges. You will find peace of mind when you allow yourself to excuse others. It's okay to be mad, but there always come a time to let go and when it's time to let go, it's also time to forgive, and that will be the moment you find peace. Peace, that's the point. Don't forgive because they deserve your forgiveness, forgive because you deserve peace.
"To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you." -Lewis B. Smedes
