Sometime within the last 25 or so years, we decided that we were going to stop caring about other people. It's cool to not care about what other people think about you. But, at what extent does that cross a line? When it affects our work? Our frienships? Our relationships? The truth of the matter is that we've chosen to completely remove honesty and being candid from these everyday interactions, or even more intimate ones. That's why we're the "Hookup Generation." No one wants to get caught with feelings. So, where does that leave us?
The biggest problem we have right now is the fact that everyone is terrified of being painted as overly-emotional, "obsessed," or trying too hard. There's ridiculous rules about who can text first and during what time frame, and for what? So we can feel like a pimp? Yeah, that's really cool that we're both basically wasting our time at this point, but it's the norm now. So, what can ya do, you know? We would all much rather find ourselves quietly sneaking out at 5 a.m., praying you can find your shoes and oh God don't wake up. Okay, seriously guys. What the hell?
We're wasting some of the best years of our lives playing the most pointless mind games I've ever heard of. If you don't want to date, don't. If you do want to date, do. But, please, please, please can we stop pretending like we can just avoid the subject forever until somebody gets hurt? That's what happens when expectations aren't discussed and people spend months (or sometimes even years) avoiding any form of disagreement or conflict. Healthy relationships aren't perfect. But, they shouldn't be constant argument either. Yeah, the idea of asking someone what they want out of seeing each other makes me want to jump off of a cliff, but so does spending nine months dating someone that ultimately just wanted to waste your time. So, I guess you pick your battles.
I think that there's a fine line to be crossed when it comes to this sort of thing, but only because society has made it this way. Men are supposed to be aloof and show no emotion. Females show too much emotion. Where's the happy medium?
Why can't people just go on a freaking date anymore?
This isn't to say one party is more guilty than the other. I think people from the age of 18-25 are all stuck in some sort of weird loop that prevents us from just saying what we want to say, or even meaning what we say. So, instead we just keep wasting each others' time and wondering when something is ever going to "feel" right.
First of all, you're not going to be able to tell if you never give anyone a chance.
Secondly, it's probably time we stop dragging out messy relationships we maintain with our exes, too. They don't work. They just don't. So, if you can be friends and not hate each other, cool. But, sometimes its best just to remove yourself from the situation entirely.
That's not to say hooking up is a necessarily a bad thing. If that's your thing, you do you booboo. But, it isn't really conducive of getting into successful relationships, either.
Ultimately, I'll leave everyone with a few things to dwell on. If you like someone, tell them. If you want someone to leave you the hell alone, tell them. Most importantly, enjoy this life. It's short, but it goes on.
Say what you mean to say.
