This is not the typical article explaining the “positives” coming from a long distance relationship. If we’re going to be honest, long distance really sucks. When I was a sophomore in high school I knew I wanted to go out of state for college, but it wasn’t until the fall of my senior year I started dating my current boyfriend. A five-hour drive isn’t crazy far, but I’m on campus without a car and if my boyfriend isn’t in class he’s working so he can pay his bills. We are both students with a limited amount of time and money.
Why does it suck so bad? Well, after seeing each other multiple times a week for months on end, one gets used to always having the other's company. It’s not that you’re dependent on that person, but it’s because you’re so used to always having them by your side. When you only get to see your boyfriend/girlfriend every couple of months, the initial connection that made things so easy, starts to fade. Both people in the relationship need to try even harder to keep things going, no matter if a fight just ended or if you’re swamped with studying, three essays, and a project. Long distance can drain you emotionally, mentally, and physically. It’s so easy to hang up or not respond to a text when you’re fighting and don’t feel like talking. Not only does this not solve anything, but the person on the other end of the conversation (or lack there of) becomes even more hurt. I know from experience that after the 4th time trying to call back, you start to question whether or not it’s worth it. Trust is key in a long distance relationship and it can easily be broken.
When I first arrived on campus I was overwhelmed by the new freedom I had. I hung out with some girls who encouraged me to lie to my boyfriend and as they say, “Liars always get caught.” Lying about going out one night with my friends was not worth all the trust issues that arose in my relationship after that. Things between my boyfriend and I are much better now, but it set us back a few steps. I put our whole relationship (and the four years it took us to get here) at risk. On a lighter note, I’m someone who loves to lay in bed with someone next to me. When I’m on campus I don’t get to do that, besides when my boyfriend’s in town. Once he leaves my little twin bed feels surprisingly empty (and that’s coming from someone who keeps five pillows on her bed at all times).
Now, not everyone in a long distance relationship will face these problems, but that doesn’t mean being apart from the person you love is easy. When my boyfriend comes to visit he makes campus my favorite place in the world. It's just nice to have “that someone special” around because you know you'll cherish the few days you have together.
