Ever since we were kids, we’ve been pressured and pushed into figuring out what we want to do when we reach adulthood. In kindergarten, we were asked, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” In middle school, we took aptitude tests to see our strengths and weaknesses and what our future job could be. In high school, we were asked to focus on what we were good at and take as many AP classes as possible to get a leg up for college. And now here we are, in the prime of our lives and youth, when everything is supposed to be fun and exciting and new — yet we’re still miserable.

In truth, college is fun for about three months until you realize that at the end of this very short four-year road, you’re supposed to have enough experience and skills to get a job that gives you health benefits and a 401K plan (what even is that?). It’s really overwhelming at times, and sometimes it feels like the end is coming so fast but you still feel like you’re 14 years old: lost and confused and wondering how in the hell you’re going to make it on your own.

So, here’s the real truth about having your life together in college: it doesn’t exist. That’s right, get this: no one has their entire life together right now. It doesn’t matter if you just started high school or if you’re graduating college in a few months — no one is really 100 percent prepared. And if you think you are, you’re not. I’ve had friends that have dreamed of being doctors since the ninth grade, but when they got to college, realized they really had more of a knack for English or political science. My own uncle graduated with an engineering degree and later on decided he wanted to be a doctor, so he went back to school for eight more years and became a doctor. I wanted to be a teacher until about a year ago, and now I want to be a lawyer. But then some days, I figure being a teacher wouldn’t be that bad. My point is: it’s absolutely OK to not have everything planned out. I tell myself I’m going to go to law school in two years, but am I actually going to go? Who knows? I make myself feel better by saying that I will, but in all honesty I don’t have the slightest idea what I want to do — and that’s OK! You might feel like everyone else has it all figured out, but they don’t.

I’ve given up being upset about not having everything figured out because I can do that when I’m older and I have more money. For now, I have full faith that things will fall into place and I will find what I’m truly good at. I’m allowing myself to be open to new opportunities and take classes that I’ve always wanted to try. The best way to find yourself and what you want to do is to be completely open to the endless possibilities you are given — eventually one day one of them will stick out to you and you’ll just know that’s what you want to do. Take your time, or don’t! Go to school for 15 years until you figure it out, take out $60,000 worth of student loans and when you’re paying them back until you’re 85, laugh to yourself and say, “This is the price I paid to find my true passion.” Find yourself, however and whenever you want. And remember, nobody has their life together right now, and that’s our one common bond.