Once life finally begins to calm some after the craziness of planning a wedding, and then actually getting married, it is easy to forget to continue to date your spouse with the normal everyday routines of life starting back up.
I got engaged the summer before my very last semester of college. While I was so thrilled that I would actually be getting married, I was also determined to finish my last semester of undergrad strong. However, mid-semester I was involved in an accident which ended with me suffering a broken leg, and with that, all of my focus was turned towards healing and school. I began to neglect any and all wedding plans that I had even remotely thought about.
Once I graduated in December and was finally able to focus on my wedding some, I was also coming to terms with my recent diagnosis of anxiety. My mother, my rock, and amazing wedding planner was left to plan the wedding of my dreams on her own with little help from me from four hours away.
I say all of this because this is one year that I should've been able to spend in pure bliss making memories with my future husband, but was actually a year that was chaotic. We didn't have the time to truly date, spend time together, or even do many weddings planning together.
December 3rd made six beautiful months that we have been married. Two of those months during the summer were spent four hours apart during the work week. We were doing what we had to do, but it made the summer long and heartbreaking as we said our goodbyes each Sunday night.
Early November we finally received our wedding pictures and it was then that we sat down and looked at them together and realized that we hadn't dated or spent quality time together lately. We live in the same apartment and go to sleep in the same bed each night, but we haven't taken the time to date and focus on each other.
We agreed that we needed to just go on a date.
Not one that requires a fancy dinner or a lot of money, because that isn't us. But one that we will enjoy and just be able to focus intently on each other. This was honestly not a thought I had had until this point. We had been so busy with our everyday life and new routines and fell into that pattern.
It is important to continue to date even when you "have the girl and know she's yours". Most of the time girls just want quality over quantity. No distractions are important, such as being on the phone the entire date. I know it's hard to not just pick up your phone and scroll on your Facebook newsfeed, but that just takes away from the quality of the date. Some of my all-time favorite date ideas are:
1. A picnic
I love going to North Farm and setting up a blanket on the side of the hill being surrounded by the beauty of the scenery. One evening while we were eating our Pita Pit (my fave) we were talking about how nice it would be to have an animal to cuddle once we get married and are in our own apartment. So we picked up our trash and drove to the animal shelter and cuddled cats and dogs until closing. We now have two sons (dogs) with personalities of their own that are out of this world.
2. Take a drive
I struggle with anxiety pretty bad. One of my favorite things to do when I feel an anxiety attack approaching is taking a drive, and this is where my love for little adventures began. Sometimes it's great for us to pause on what we're doing and just take off for either 20 minutes or an hour and a half and just turn up the radio and reminisce on great memories.
Just be careful if you choose to take your animal children. Our Judah once got so scared of a motorcycle behind us that he pooped in the backseat of my car. We have never laughed so hard while we drove back home at 10:00 at night on Highway 12. This makes for a great memory that I am sure we'll laugh about forever.
3. Make a pallet and blanket fort in your living room
Okay, so I don't have a story about this, but I used to do this with my best friend all of the time and it's one of my favorite things to do. Getting to now do this with my husband is just as incredible, he just chooses to not do his nails with me. But it's perfect for a movie marathon with some hot chocolate!
By having these simple and sweet little dates we make sure that we are spending time together and not letting our busy schedules and life distract us from that. You married each other for a reason and just because you are now married doesn't mean that the dating has to stop. If anything it should become even greater. Life must go on and you may still be in school, or have to work and have responsibilities on top of other responsibilities, but don't forget to spend time together dating.
