Even If You're Married, You Should Be Dating | The Odyssey Online
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Even If You're Married, You Should Be Dating

To my husband that loves me through all my deepest flaws.

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Even If You're Married, You Should Be Dating
Janice Bacani

My husband and I started dating since 2002 and married for almost eight years, and one thing we both know is that marriage and kids are not all cupcakes and rainbows. We said our vows and signed our marriage contract hoping to be a success.

Then it happens: marital bliss sizzles and the mundane reality takes over the romance.

I sometimes wish marriage and kids came with a manual but whatever manual or self-help books can never substitute the life lessons ahead. So here is a list to remind each other how both of you can conquer the vortex of marriage.

1. You both are rooting for LASTING 72 hours of marriage and realize it's eight years already

2. Take all the ADVICE coming your way, but remember that it's your family and your life

3. Always remember that you are a TEAM and both can either run or sink a boat

4. Remind each other that there is still time TALK and REFLECT

Saying sorry is a good start, but it should never end there. Analyze the problem and work through it.

5. Please continue to have a DATE NIGHT

I never really thought that dating could be significant, but work and kids can make you forget this simple moment. I see the joy and loving feelings of being together and learned that taking the time out strengthens our relationship.

6. Please be ADVENTUROUS

I mean going to dinner and a movie is great but it can quickly get old. It doesn't have to be as thrilling as skydiving. Planning and putting the effort on dating as a couple creates a shared and passionate experience.

7. Always be CONSISTENT

Hugs and kisses are a must for both of us even when we are both mad at each other. I know that if neither of us does this, it can affect our day or mood.

8. Be PASSIONATE and RESPECT each other's interest

Know that you started as an individual with different taste in music, food or sports but that does not mean you can't support each other.

9. Have FAITH

Life brings everyone down, but you have to remember that someone believes in you. At the end of the day, your partner's loving arms will always be there.

10. HAVE FUN

What? There is such a thing after eight years and having children. Yes, it is called a great sense of humor and laughing out the bad experience. I believe that if both are having fun, then it erases the distress of marriage.


A fabulous wedding does not create a happy marriage. It is the hard labor of trying to work things out and remembering the trials and errors that brought you closer. Learning from those mistakes and looking back to see the fruits of your labor is already a success. One must not strive for a successful marriage but the perseverance for one another.

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