Most preteen and teenagers spend their time causally dating each other and have fun going on cute, little dates. There us also a lot of drama with girls in middle school and high school because of this dating game, they steal each other's boyfriends and date the person their friend wanted to or whatever the case might be.
My life has been complicated since my preteen years (Who didn't have complicated preteen years though?). So when I was fourteen I decided I was going to not date until I was at least eighteen or nineteen. In my head at that time I felt like my life would be settled down by then.
I was made fun of by my friends because I was dating, because they didn't understand the promise I had made. But I didn't care that I was being made fun of, I was going to fulfill the promise I had made.
When I turned fifteen I started praying for my potential future husband. But in the beginning the prayers were very self-centered. One night God spoke to me in the midst of me praying about my future husband and He said to me, "My Child, I have written all your days in My book, trust My plan." I knew then that I was being self-centered and my prayers changed to me seeking out God's will in when I should start to pursuit a potential husband and who it might be.
The idea of dating with the intention of marriage is not a popular idea, at least not as much as it was twenty years ago, but it is how I am choosing to live my life. I want more than what a dating relationship offers, and I am not settling for less in this. I want something deeper, something more meaningful. I want a relationship that isn't self-centered but is Christ centered and we want to serve each other and serve Christ together. I want a relationship that the foundation is the truth of God's Word and we grow in Christ together. I want a relationship where we pray together and we pray for one another daily. I want a relationship that is faithful to one another and to God, knowing we will spend forever together. I want a relationship without doubts. I want a relationship that even though we know we have conflict we never go to bed angry and we do not hold grudges.
I want love that is patient
I want love that is kind
I want love that is not jealous
I want love that does not brag and is not arrogant
I want love that does not act unbecomingly
I want love that does not seek its own
I want love that is not provoked
I want love that does not take account wrongs suffered
I want love that does not rejoice in unrighteousness
I want love that rejoices in truth
I want love that bears all things
I want love that believes all things
I want love that hopes all things
I want love that endures all things
Instead of spending my time dating, I chose to work on myself. I chose to work on my relationship with God. Because when I chose to start dating and pursuing my husband I want to be ready for the journey ahead of me, a journey that will last a lifetime.
