We all hear about sex, lust, hookups, mistakes, and the duds. But what really happens with those? What benefit is there to hooking up with people?

My philosophy (I can't take complete credit, as it was originally my sister's idea) is that any date (or hookup), as disastrous as it could be, is practice for the guy you end up really liking and you might as well practice because, like it or not, dating is a skill that takes time to master.

I have never heard anything more accurate. Many girls these days complain that they aren’t being asked out on an official date, and they must succumb to a hookup in order to get a boy’s attention.

OK, well, maybe. But then again, if you’re taking part in hooking up with them, but still complaining that they didn’t take you to dinner or a movie first, isn’t that pretty hypocritical?

I mean, sure, some guys are the stereotypical "guy." And the guys I know are singularly focused on one thing: wanting girls.

Right now, maybe it’s not their time to ask you on a real date. Maybe they just want to be free and live their life before some crazy gal comes along and pulls at their heartstrings and actually makes them want to settle down.

If you’re the girl who’s complaining about not going on a date, I wonder if you’ve ever asked a boy on a date. Have you? Have you asked him to grab dinner or maybe even just coffee? Has he rejected you? Is that why you think it’s only the guy’s responsibility to reach out?

And if you've decided that consistently hooking up with a guy is a good idea, then you cannot expect love to blossom and the guy to read your mind if you want more. How in the devil would he know you wanted more unless you, by golly, actually said something?

Sure, I understand, we can easily play the “it’s so intimidating” card, but why can’t guys play that card then too?

All I want to point out here is that not only are you expecting a guy to read your mind, but you're also assigning gender-specific roles limited only for guys to fulfill. The boy always has to initiate the date, is that what you're saying?

Look at yourself. You’re beautiful, and any boy would be lucky to get you. But what’s to say he truly has the balls to walk up to you and say, “Hey, choose me. Go on a date with me,” and who's to say either of you really want that?

There’s some truth to the saying that you want what you don’t have.

Yes, we have now fallen into a culture where dating during college is a rarity, and hooking up has become all too common. Still, gals, c’mon! Open up your eyes. If you want something, go for it! Don't let the expectations that usually go into dating hold you back.

If you want a boyfriend, grow a pair and go get one.

XO,

The girl who’s tired of hearing girls complain