It is our job as American citizens and members of the human race to listen. When someone is conflicted and in pain, we should show compassion, mercy and love. We should not try to make our needs more important at that moment, but rather work to fix the problem another person sees.

In the wake of Alton Sterling and Dallas and everything else that has occurred over the last week, month, year, and history of our nation, I am troubled. I am troubled that members of our population feel oppressed. I am troubled by the examples I see of that oppression. I am troubled that violence has become the only way to gain our attention. Am I so blind to this world that it takes death to pull my head out of the sand and see the problems? Apparently so. While I was aware of inequality, I was not aware of the extent of it. I was not aware of my own privilege.

I spoke with a friend a while back about white privilege and how he viewed it as an African American male. He said it was not having to be afraid whenever you walked outside of your house. It was not being referred to as "you people" when out in public. It was the difference between "innocent until proven guilty" and "guilty until proven innocent." It was not always having to prove to everyone that you are equal... equality is just assumed because of your color. It is not being accused of committing crimes like selling drugs because of your melatonin. It is not being treated differently on an online forum when you change your avatar to a picture of yourself. It is the lack of parental guidance against doing certain things like being in a large group of people of your race, not picking up things you don't intend to buy in the store, and always being aware of your surroundings. It is the lack of fear that my friend and other African Americans walk around with every day. It is a sense of belonging that isn't questioned by the color of your skin. Nobody has every told me to "go back to Europe."

I am privileged. My melatonin affords me advantages and protections that I can't see because they're things I've always had. I don't see them as a privilege, but rather as something I'm entitled to. My willingness to admit my white privilege comes largely from the fact that I realized how deep my privilege is. And I realized how it all felt like something I was entitled to, and I decided that it was something I thought everyone was entitled to. Why should I feel safe and wanted and protected if others don't? Why should I be granted the privilege of not having to worry about being in a large group, being accused of a crime, or being treated differently because people saw a picture of me? The answer is, I shouldn't. I shouldn't expect these things to be a given for me if they aren't for one of my American sisters or brothers. I shouldn't have grown up in a society that automatically saw me as smarter and better than someone else based on no merit of my own, but rather just the color of my skin.

White privilege is real. It is something we don't want to admit because we can't see it. We believe white privilege means that society gave us something that we didn't have to work for, and we don't like that idea. We don't like the idea that half of the respect we're given has to do with our skin. We don't like admitting that we've had an unfair advantage. Here is the good news. You don't have to give up your privilege. You can keep it. It's yours.

The deal is, you need to use it to work to extend that privilege to everyone who is an American citizen regardless of race, nationality, ethnicity, sexual orientation, religious preference, etc. You need to work to put an end to racism. You need to work to extend white privilege to "American privilege." You need to bridge the gap. You need to work to heal the nation.

All of us-- cops, African Americans, white people, Hispanics, Muslims, Christians, LGBTQ, straight people-- everyone needs to join together. This country was created as a "melting pot." We need to work on blending all of the unique flavors together into one United State that speaks out against violence and celebrates the tolerance and acceptance of diversity.