Recently, many of my closest friends and I have gone through some huge life changes. Many of us are stuck, trying to find our way in a chaotic world. Everyone goes through this at some point, but it's important to know how to navigate it.
Yes, I subscribe to the notion that everything happens for a reason. I'm sure you're thinking that it's just some crap people make up to feel better, but let's really step back and think about it.
When was the first time you thought life was falling apart and you had no idea how it would go on? You were probably pretty young, and you likely lost your favorite blanket. You cried, threw a tantrum, and pouted for days. How could that have benefits?
Well, when I was younger I lost my pacifier. Later, I found out my parents knew exactly where it was, but still, for all I knew it was LOST FOREVER. I was very upset and I definitely thought, even as a child, "It can't get any worse than this." Turns out, though it really was a good thing.
See, I was around 4 at this time. One might say, too old for a pacifier. Losing it and having to move on made me realize I didn't need one, and I spared myself much embarrassment as I got older.
But, as we all know, small problems become more important in the grand scheme of things as you get older. So what's one of the bigger times in your life when you thought you couldn't go on? Mine was in eighth grade. The day my mom really and truly got sick. Basically, in the span of one month. She was told she needed to go on oxygen, needed a lung transplant, and without that, she would die in the next four years.
I'm sure you can imagine why I thought my world was falling apart. And well, it kind of did. My mom and I could no longer run around together, and as she got worse, she couldn't do many of the things she wanted to do for us as our mom.
Despite that, I truly learned how to grow up, and do it quick. I'm now so much more responsible than I ever would've been without going through it. I've gotten to travel all over for my mom to influence others' lives and hopefully help them choose to not make the same mistakes she did. Additionally, I've learned to truly appreciate my mom, even if I don't show it as much as I'd like to. These things and so many others never would've happened without going through this life-altering event where I was certain I wouldn't get through it.
(By the way, it's over six years later. She still has no transplant but she's holding in there! She just got back from a national TV interview in California, actually!)
So, I promise you, you will make it through. Take a deep breath, step back, and take little victories as they come. Day by day, you'll find your new normal, and going through such a difficult time will truly make you a better person.
Everything happens for a reason, even if you haven't discovered that reason yet.