Faygo plays an essential role in the life of a Michigander. The sweet nectar runs just as deep in my blood as Superman ice cream, a few too many Euchre losses and lake water. If you're at a party with pop but no Faygo representation, you're at the wrong party. A problem does present itself, though, when you go searching the pop aisle in Meijer for some Faygo and you're hit with a barrage of flavor and color. At least, once you find your favorite, you pretty much stick with it. As a result, a person's favorite Faygo flavor is a good indicator of their personality and the key to getting to know them.
1. Cotton Candy
The bubbly one; this person is incredibly optimistic and energetic. They can do absolutely anything with a smile and a voice that flutters like a joyful hummingbird that just got away with rigging the lottery. This person is fantastic in doses, but still a great friend to keep close because good vibes are important in life. This reigns true even when you feel like tossing them off a cliff for their ridiculous laugh.
2. Moon Mist
The self-proclaimed cool one; this person is easy to pick out of a party, because they think they're the bomb-diggity. They want you to know it, too. They'll be the one talking really loud about how sweet their "party" was the other day, which they won't give any details about beyond the fact that it was "lit". They could legitimately be cool, but we'll never know because they didn't buy Mountain Dew like they should have, so we don't give them a chance.
3. Candy Apple
The charming, weird one; this person knows the flavor shouldn't be good, but they love it anyway. They do their own thing and love every minute of it, even if no one else is doing it. They're probably supportive of your own, personal flavor choice but still stand by their Candy Apple. Somehow they even make their quirks into a quality that attracts friends like fruit flies to the untouched fruit bowl sitting in your kitchen. You will love them in time, no matter what.
4. Rock N' Rye/Red Pop
The good-time one; this person loves to enjoy themself, usually with other people. Rock N' Rye and Red Pop are iconic Faygo drinks selected by people who aim to have a great night. Does that mean terrible Netflix movies? Does that mean clubbing? Does that mean staying up past your bed time because of the sugar rush? It doesn't matter, you've got the cool people to have a good time and they all have black shades and leather jackets because they're that cool.
The loyal one; this person is the one who will stick with you through just about anything. Beyond actually being loyal in times of strife (like when they bought chocolate chip cookies to replace the oatmeal raisin ones you oh so mistakenly purchased), they show how loyal they are by blindly staying true to the Faygo name when they know that Vernors is far better. The person who loves the Gold flavor deserves to be put into your zombie survival plan because you'll need them.