It's the most wonderful time of the year. Your lips are chapped, your knuckles are cracked, and you somehow made it through this semester without starving and failing out of all your classes. But nothing is going to douse that flame burning inside you that we call Christmas spirit. In just a few days, you are going to be slouched in the living room pigging out to mama's leftovers and watching ABC Family religiously. Santa is scheduled to arrive in a couple weeks so you have to prepare accordingly. But what does your favorite holiday classic say about who you are as a person?
1. "Elf"
"Elf" is universally loved by all shapes and sizes. Will Ferrell is comedic genius and if you disagree, you lack key life and social skills. If this is your absolute favorite Christmas movie, you are not alone. You belong to the majority of our Christmas loving generation. Your hobbies include listening to overplayed pop hits on the radio, Snapchatting pictures of your Starbucks coffee, and ordering cheesy chicken rice at your local Mexican restaurant. You're going to love sorority recruitment next term!
2. "Christmas Vacation"
If this is your favorite, you've definitely seen some shit. This movie is relatable to you because your family is dysfunctional and crazy. To the point where they make a movie about it. You are most likely the funniest person in your squad because you grew up watching movies like this with you family. Which also means your family has some sort of sense of humor.
3. "How the Grinch Stole Christmas"
As a kid, you watched the cartoon every day in December twice at the least. Accordingly, you are a lazy SOB. You are also a smart ass, but somehow all the professors love you. Little do they know they know you never get anything done. Ever. You don't get out of bed until 1 p.m. every day and still seem to get by without a job or any source of income. All you ever want to is sit on the couch and watch Netflix until the next day.
4. "Home Alone"
You might be the worst type of person. Don't get me wrong, it is a good movie, but Macaulay Culkin is not someone you want to look up to. You are conniving, double timing bastard who thrives off other's misfortune. As a kid, you came up with sneaky little plans to get your siblings in trouble. You had ample time to plot because you were stuck in your room grounded. You grew up to be the ring leader of your crew full of future convicts and McDonald's employees. The absolute definition of a bad influence.
Whatever you and your family watch this holiday season, be sure to enjoy the blessings you receive and remember what is important.
