What To Do When Your College Friends Don't Return
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What To Do When Your College Friends Don't Return

What I discovered when my two closest friends in college didn't return for the spring semester.

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What To Do When Your College Friends Don't Return
Photo by Nathan Carr

When the Fall semester of my freshman year came to an end, I discovered that neither of my two closest would be returning to OBU with me. Though I knew other students I hadn’t developed any other serious friendships in that first semester, and I never thought of myself as someone who was great at making friends. That said, returning for J-term came with fears of not having anyone to hang out with or talk to or, as is the greatest fear in every school based movie, not having anyone to sit with during lunch (not that there is anything wrong with these things).

Within the first week of J-term, I made more friends than any other time in my life. Rather than sitting alone at lunch I found myself at the largest table of kids in the cafeteria. Instead of sitting in my dorm alone I was going out more than I did with my closest friends from Fall semester. How did I get here? I find myself asking that a lot lately, even now as I sit in a group of friends typing this. Here is the answer I’ve come up with: I got here by saying ‘yes’.

I know, I know that sounds ridiculous but it is the truth. I started saying yes to the things I had become so accustomed to making up excuses to get out of. Had someone asked me in the fall to sit with them and their friends at lunch I would have politely declined and waited for my friends to go to lunch. Now that my options were that or go back to my dorm I took a chance and said yes. I may have sat quietly after introducing myself but I was there. After decidedly not dying of awkwardness at lunch that day I decided to start saying yes to more things.

The next day I agreed to lunch again, after lunch I agreed to go play games. As the days went on I was agreeing to things that I probably never would have while in my comfort zone of two friends. Soon I was taking trips to coffee shops and going thrift shopping, meeting someone new almost every day. I’ve made many friends and a multitude of memories with them. Driving down back roads, playing just dance, and hammocking around campus the things I found myself doing were almost laughable in comparison to what I did in the Fall.

Saying ‘yes’ welcomed more possibilities to my life. It may have been awkward at times, but I found out the other kids were awkward too. I can’t speak for everyone, but as for me, I’d rather be awkward with a group than awkward alone. So, maybe losing my two friends wasn’t the best, but it allowed me to start over and become a part of a new group. To those friends who left, I am thankful that I got to know you and I hope to never forget the good times we had in college. To the friends I have made, thank you for accepting me with all my awkwardness and for being the friends I didn’t think I could find; I look forward to making more memories with you all.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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