Coming from Long Island, NY, I’m used to chilly Decembers, with precipitation varying from snow flurries to snow storms, frozen bodies of water, and all the lovely winter culture that comes with this weather. So, you can imagine my dismay when I traveled to Texas over winter break and discovered that it was 20 degrees cooler in Dallas than 60-degree New York.
If you look at the greater picture, beyond the possibility that the Earth is melting into oblivion and life as we know it will soon cease to exist, there are some potential perks.
For instance, there are ginormous discounts on cold weather clothes.
Since retailers, like everyone else, anticipated cooler temperatures, they had all their super cute winter designs all set and ready for sale. As stumped as we are, many have had to lower their prices. Which means a happier wallet for all of us! (Figuring out an appropriate time to wear it in this temperature is your problem though…)
Influenza has been kept at bay.
Although the cold weather is not directly responsible for stereotypical cold weather illnesses like the cold or the flu, these germs tend to spread more efficiently in the cold weather than in the warm. So fewer people have died this season from the flu! Yay! (Con: fewer cop-outs and sick day excuses)
(^^^^This is a real problem.)
To bloom or not to bloom?
There’s some lovely foliage and landscapes around as the December heat is tricking flowers into putting on their spring display. Obvi the plants are as confused as we are since their flowers are blooming in January.
But when what you really want is just to look at the window at a Winter Wonderland or to wear your cute weather-resistant Caribou boots, there really is no winning in this weather.
Too much tea
You realize that you may have overstocked on luxury teas, and now see no hope in even denting the stash. Better get started…
But not the chocolate
But you’re definitely not going to waste all that hot chocolate you purchased a month ago when you thought it’d be relevant. So pop an ice cube in that cozy mug, suck it up, and convince yourself you’re amidst a winter paradise.
Annoying af rodents not in hibernation
You know it’s not actually winter because those pesky squirrels are still scurrying about. Please, go hide in a hole or something. This is usually my break from getting ambushed by nuts and acorns all around.
Wasted winter wardrobe
It was annoying when you had to wear a gazillion layers just to leave the house, but now, looking at your adorable winter wardrobe, there’s nothing you want to wear more.
Heat stroke?
How does one celebrate the holidays in this heat? How do I prevent heat stroke from having my fireplace on? No offense to those from warmer areas, but the holiday season isn’t actually the holiday season unless it’s chilly outside and you can get cozy and comfy indoors. Fact.
New Year's Resolution
So, I’ve decided. My New Year’s Resolution this year will be to become super well-versed and adept at meteorological phenomena so that I, personally, will solve this horrible problem that is an obstacle to me thoroughly enjoying my winter break.
It cannot go on like this.
