There seems to be a stigma around mental illness. Things get lost in translation and what shouldn't be awkward or uncomfortable becomes so. This shouldn't be an issue at all. Here are 20 things that people with anxiety want you to know.
1. We can feel alone in a crowded room.
We could be sitting in class, appearing completely calm and indifferent -- maybe even smiling -- but on the inside we are trying to fight off all forms of a panic attack.
3. We aren't snobs.
Our shyness and lack of talking can come across that way. One girl, that I had never met, went up to me once in fifth grade and said, “You know, you may think you're popular, but everyone else thinks you’re just full of yourself.” Perceptions can be misjudged and assumptions made. Nobody truly knows what’s going on inside.
4. We need our space.
Every once in a while we need some time to ourselves. It’s nothing personal; just that instead of having a night out on the town, we like to sit down, read, watch a movie, or bake. It calms us.
5. We overanalyze EVERYTHING.
If someone jokes around with us, our minds automatically analyze: tone, diction, anything. Every word we hear, laughs that echo behind our backs, or situations we are in, get thought about over and over again, until sleep overcomes us.
6. Routine. Routine. Routine.
We like when things are the same. Last minute decisions shake us and all of the sudden we are thrust into the unknown.
7. Crutches are our lifelines.
We walk through crowded halls, slouched over our mobile devices like it was a Bible. People can also be our crutches. We tend to always ask someone to come with us to do the easiest things. We know it can be annoying, but we truly appreciate those who offer to be a crutch unknowingly.
8. We are sick experts.
I can’t even count how many times I faked being sick to get out of a presentation, parties, hangouts, appointments… anything.
9. Sometimes words get stuck.
We stutter. Things come out wrong. Everything is awkward. Please be patient with us.
10. Sensory overload.
Sometimes we just can’t handle talking, loud music… Little acts that normally shouldn’t bother us, but do.
11. We zone out.
Whoops, sorry, I was thinking of everything that could possibly go wrong in this situation. Please repeat what you just said?
12. Conversations are hard.
Again, we are awkward and horribly shy. It takes a lot of courage to just keep going with a conversation.
13. We will ask the same question multiple times, just to be sure.
We have to make sure the event is at 7 PM multiple times to calm the anxiety that’s telling us we are wrong.
14. We say sorry like three times a day.
We feel annoying with all our quirks.
15. People staring at us is our worst nightmare.
Because if they are staring it means something is wrong with us/our outfit/ hair/makeup/personality.
16. Our minds are the loudest voice in the room.
It dictates what we do, how we act, and what we say. It’s the friend you have to stay friends with because being enemies would be much worse.
17. Public speaking is the death of us.
Presenting in front of the class successfully is the equivalent of getting a 2400 on the SATs. My mom would always reward me with a favorite dinner, money, or a fun trip.
18. We constantly need reassurance.
We honestly need reassurance that you aren’t sick of us yet. People leaving is our worst nightmare and we fear that our anxiety will push everyone away.
19. WE HATE CHANGE.
Now, this may sound a lot like #6, but believe me, it's different for people with anxiety. Total different ball game. The teacher decides to have class in Room 423 instead of 544? We'll have to map out the new route and double check just in case. Anything could go wrong. Just changing our drink order is risky.
20. Don't tell us to "get over it."
Other phrases that depress us include:
"Anxiety isn't even that bad."
"Just stop being scared."
"Just talk more."
"You'll grow out of it."
"You're just shy!"
There are many more, but those are the most common ones we hear on a day-to-day basis.
