Last week, a friend of mine described anxiety as "feeling like you are on a roller coaster when laying in bed."
At the exact moment I read this text, I was under the covers in the dark in my dorm room. I was completely still, but my heart was beating at approximately 100 miles per hour and my limbs were about as movable as solid lead. My body was taking a roller coaster ride that I had not signed up for.
All because of a text message that I wasn't quite sure how to respond to.
Coping with anxiety in everyday life is not easy. It's like trying to silence the malevolent devil on your shoulder who constantly whispers panic-inducing nothings into your ear.
Merriam-Webster defines anxiety as "an abnormal and overwhelming sense of apprehension and fear often marked by physiological signs (as sweating, tension, and increased pulse), by doubt concerning the reality and nature of the threat, and by self-doubt about one's capacity to cope with it."
This doesn't quite do it justice.
A person's anxiety can range from occasional to constant or crippling to simply annoying. It's never consistent, but it's there, at least a little, every day.
Some days can start great -- popping out of bed in the morning and brewing a fresh cup of coffee, taking deep breaths, and getting ready to start a new day and hoping for the best.
But a lot of days don't begin so well: Ignoring your alarm and having to coax yourself out from under the covers--if you can even make it out of bed at all--and staring at your reflection in the mirror trying to convince yourself that things will go okay but expecting the worst.
Having daily anxiety means that the smallest incident can induce fear, worry, and negative thoughts. Something as silly as spilling that fresh cup of coffee can turn that good day sour. Getting to class a few minutes late can make nerves go haywire, worrying if the professor is mad, if he'll deduct points, or if you missed any important material. This worrying then turns into something entirely counterproductive because it makes it hard to focus for the rest of class time.
Something that seems truly minor to the average individual can be panic-inducing for someone who suffers from anxiety. Missing a homework assignment, a harmless argument with a friend, forgetting to lock your door, getting a text from an ex, waking up with a pimple--what may be little frustrations to some can be extremely difficult to handle for those with anxiety.
Anxiety is constantly worrying about what happens next -- whether it's in ten years, two weeks, or an hour from now -- and not feeling confident that things will turn out well. But it is also the ceaseless nerves about what just happened. What did I do weird in that social interaction? Did I just completely bomb that test? Why can't I go back and redo everything?
It's hard to cope with anxiety and to make people who don't live with the same experience understand. It's important to know that if you have a loved one with anxiety, all they really need from you is support. Be there on the good days and the bad days equally. It helps them to simply know you have their back.
And for those who live with anxiety, you should know that you have to live for the good days, though easier said than done. Your situation is never hopeless, and even on days when your anxiety is the darkest of clouds and everything keeps you on edge and you can't stop worrying, just know that the sun always shines again.
