Here you are again. You're supposed to be enjoying yourself, but instead your mind is racing with unanswered, unnecessary questions. You have been here a million times, yet you never seem to master the art of being completely at ease with a clear head.
I have been an emotional person for my entire life. No matter how much I grow as a person and learn to let go and just sit back, I will always be the over thinker in the room. I will always be analyzing every detail of what people say to me and what my response will be. I will never not be planning my next decision in life. I will never not be planning my entire week ahead or two weeks ahead.. or three. I seem to be so busy pre-meditating absolutely everything that's happening and then STILL analyzing things as they are actually happening that I cannot enjoy what's going on.
People who do not overanalyze will never understand how exhausting it is to be going through the normal struggles of a twenty-something as well as having a dark cloud full of thoughts hanging over your head at all times. No one wants to be like this. No one wants to be stressed out 75% of the time. It becomes a juggling act in your head.
Focus on how much fun you're having, Sarah. Focus on quality time with your friends. Wait, you are being too much fun now. Wait, you are being too quiet. Just go home and call it a day. Do they even really like being your friend? Gosh, you have to be awake early tomorrow.. if you go to bed now, you'll get at least six hours of sleep. But you could totally survive on five.. just enjoy yourself, Sarah. Let it go. Be cool, be cool.
And the list of endless thoughts and worries goes on and on.
We all have our demons. No one is calm and collected all of the time. For you, at this point in your life, you're probably a professional over analyzer. You just want out. It's become crippling. I just want you to know you are not alone. If you are reading this, I get you. All of us over thinkers must band together as a united front and show all of the chill, yoga addicted, zen and good vibe advocates that we can still have a great time. We fully support a lifestyle of living in the moment and not asking so many questions all of the time, but our brains are just wired a little differently.
It is ok to feel too much, and it is more than ok to express those feelings. You don't have to bottle up anything. Embrace who you are and how many details you notice that others don't. Breathe deep, and know that you are not alone in your struggle to put a stop to the millions of voices in your head.
