I keep a mental list of things I want to buy. I want this shirt, I want these pair of shoes, I want this jacket, and the list goes on. In my head, if I check off all of the mental “empty boxes”, I’ll feel better. I’ll feel happy and content. In my head, if I can finally purchase all of the items I want, I won’t feel the need to purchase anything else. But for some reason, the inclination to buy more clothes and more shoes and more items always returns. It’s because I will never be content with what I have if I just continuously look for more.
It’s so interesting to me to hear people talk about happiness like this—as if it’s an achievement of some sort.
“If I make this happen, I’ll finally be happy.”
“If I achieve this goal, I’ll finally be happy.”
“if I can be like this person, I’ll finally be happy.”
I once thought that way too. I thought that if I could finally reach this state of where I wanted to be and who I wanted to be, I could be happy. Trying to reach this point of happiness through other things will obviously never happen, and if I base my life off of building blocks to reach happiness, I will only be left feeling empty in the end.
It’s just not about achievement. It’s not about who you are. It’s not about who you’re friends with or how many people you know. Sure, those things can make you happy for a second. But if you solely base your happiness off of these things, you’ll, once again, feel empty. These things fade. This prideful joy and these flimsy versions of pleasantries will go away after the “newness” of this dies. The happiness you're seeking for is not a destination.
It’s about being content right now. I mean, being content where you’re sitting right at this very second reading this exact article, breathing in this air you’re breathing in the environment you’re in right now. And feeling this way isn’t something that just happens. Being content isn’t like being hungry. When you’re hungry, you don’t choose to be hungry. It’s automatic. However, you choose to be content. It’s a choice. As being content is a choice, being happy is a choice.
You can decide to focus on what’s going wrong in your life. You can even decide to let it ruin your day and change your attitude. But here’s the cold, hard truth: we’re all going through something. We all endure versions of hell, just different devils. And those who seem “happy” and like they have it “all together” have gone through horrible things and may be going through terrible things right now. The difference is, these people do not dwell.
I’m not saying you can’t be sad. That’s human. Life happens, and it hurts. It’s healthy to allow yourself to be sad sometimes. But, you cannot allow yourself to be sad all of the time.
We must progress in a direction that betters us, strengthens us, and helps us grow. What troubles you is there for a reason, and you can, you must move forward. You must be content with what is thrown at you, even if you’re blindsided.
Be grateful for what you have and what you’re working towards. Be content with this life.
For you only have one.
