Dating in today’s generation has so many definitions. Dating can mean just talking to one person, talking to multiple people at the same time, or even being exclusive without having a label on your “status.” Dating can be fun if two people feel the same way about each other, but it can also hurt when one person has such strong feelings, and the other person is indecisive about you.
Being someone’s option is probably one of the worst feelings anyone can experience. When you really care about someone, all you can ask for is the same thing in return. Sometimes, when you are unsure of how someone feels about you, it can be scary putting yourself out there. However I’d rather know how they feel rather than constantly questioning back and forth where I stand with them.
It hurts knowing that someone only thinks of you when they have nothing else to do, or even worse, when the person they “want” to talk to is unavailable, so they settle for their backup. Even though we may not know we are considered someone’s “option,” you can start to tell from the other person’s actions.
When the other person texts you at their convenience, but doesn’t respond when you want to talk to them, you get that knot wrenching gut feeling in your stomach and you start to question your self-worth. You can’t help but ask or wonder if there is something wrong with you.
It’s hard to give up someone you care about, because of these strong feelings you have for a certain individual. However, it is also not worth the constant tears, questions, and anger you put yourself through when you find out the other person does not put in the same amount of effort you put towards the relationship.
While it is normal to question where you stand with someone in a relationship, you should not prolong it to a point where you start questioning yourself and end up crushing your own self-esteem because you feel as if you are not good enough for someone.
The truth is, you should never let yourself get to a point with someone where you are considered their “backup”. If it gets to that point, you should realize that you deserve someone who will always put you first and will never make you question how they feel about you.
