When I was younger, I used to be so angry at my little brother because of the needs he had. He had it so much easier and got all the attention. As I grew up, He’s taught me so much without knowing it. Everyone who has ever cared about someone with special needs knows how frustrating it can be, but it’s so worth it. Although Autism Awareness month isn’t technically until April, and ADHD Awareness month was in October, these people need to be celebrated year-round. Here’s a few of the lessons I’ve learned from my little brother personally and how it’s changed me.
1: They feel everything.
All the harsh words, the looks, and the discrete comments about how “sorry” you are that it happened to them. I can’t count the number of times I’ve gotten angry at little kids, no older than nine, calling my brother names. It’s made me bitter at times, and very overprotective. He knows what they mean, and he always asks me or my mother if he really is “retarded”. Of course, he’s not. He knows how to ride a bike, and run, and read tons of books. How can we define the term “stupid” or “retarded”? Is it not knowing how to do math? Because I am in the lowest level of math, yet I was smart enough to skip an English class. Is it not knowing how to talk correctly? Because if someone up North heard me talk, they might think it was gibberish.
2: They’re not heartless or mean
Going off the feeling everything topic, it’s not just the mean things. He gets so excited over Christmas, and he loves cuddling our baby niece. He tells me he misses me, and I’m sure he’s threatened every guy I’ve ever dated despite being at least 6 years younger than them. Every day people don’t see these moments, the kids at school don’t know his kind heart. He has his moments where I genuinely can’t believe what he says, but I am the same way. We’re both outspoken, but you can blame our strong-willed mother for that.
A note written by Alex to one of our cousins who serves in the military.
3: They’re very intelligent
Alex has so many random facts that I can’t begin to type them all. He can add or subtract in his head, which is not a gift of mine. He can make straight A’s if he wants too, however it’s hard to stay focused. As adults, we’re encouraged to do as we want. Get that dream job, instead of being stuck doing something that you hate, right? Alex is already doing that. He loves P.E, so he participates. English, however, bores him to death, so, why do it? I’m not encouraging children to not go to school, as we all must do things we dislike in life, but I’m rather offering an explanation to the way he thinks.
4: Sometimes you must take the good days with the bad
Autism can mean so many different things for so many different people, but most of the time symptoms have days where it’s easier. Some days Alex will stay in his room and not say a word, but most times rather than not he wants to stay around the rest of the family and find things to ramble through. You never know what version you’ll get, but it makes me enjoy the good moments even more.
5: They’re just like any of us
He dabs, he jams out to every rap song that comes on the radio, he asks to “practice” driving my car (LOL NO), he hates having to dress up. We look at these kids as if they’re so different, but really, he’s not. It just takes a little more patience. He’s just trying to figure out growing up, like every other awkward 13 yo, but he’s getting there. He has dreams, like going into the military, and all we should worry about is helping these kids achieve these dreams.
6: Just because they have Autism, doesn’t mean that they are mute
Or any other stereotype. There are so many misconceptions about Autism mainly because most don’t understand how broad of a term it is. They may be great at communication, I know Alex never meets a stranger, but some may not. They may be self-aggressive, but they may not. My advice is to know the person, rather than the symptoms of the disease. They all have their own personalities, just like we do. Below is a picture that helps explain how many symptoms can be involved.
