Returning home from my sophomore year of college, I noticed my parents were different from how they were when I first took off for school two years ago. Though they are still my parents, their habits have changed, their interests have broadened, and they are now new people. They may have cried after I flew away from the nest, but perhaps while I was away “expanding my mind," my parents were doing the same thing. Now that they have nothing but time on their hands, my parents are able to remember who they were eighteen years ago before they had a family. Here are just some of the weird things parents do when their kids go to college.
They move. Some children fear their childhood bedroom will be turned into a home gym when they head off to college, but some should be prepared to not return home to the same house they grew up in. Your parents worked hard for that house, tending to it every weekend, but when you left, the house became quiet and your parents may have realized that they wanted something smaller or maybe just something different in a new town, state, or even country.
They become your college's biggest fans. Growing up, you do not remember them watching any college football games that did not involve their alma mater. Yet, now that you are the first in the family to go to your particular college, they are diehard fans. They do this because they love you and want to support you, especially if your team is doing better than theirs. Just try not to freak out when they buy season tickets and ask where the best place to tailgate together is.
They adopt obscure hobbies. While your dad may have always shooed away seagulls on family vacations to the beach, he now enjoys bird watching with the neighbors Fred and Clarence every other weekend. Your mom has transitioned from regular gardening to trimming lavish topiary bushes like she works at Epcot. Makes you wonder what they would have been doing all of those countless afternoons of t-ball tournaments and dance recitals if it were up to them.
They ask about your high school friends whom you're no longer friends with. Your parents could never remember their name when you were best friends, but now that you two no longer stay in touch, they ask you how they are doing as if they secretly know that your old friend has become a monster since graduation. You will lie when you tell your parents that your old friend is doing great and then you will have to remind them the names of your new college friends.
They erase all of your DVR recordings. You do not know disappointment like waiting all semester to binge watch your favorite shows just to find your AT&T U-Verse recordings replaced with shows such as NCIS: New Orleans and Outlander.
They go on mini honeymoons. Remember when you used to get scared at night and would ask your parents if you could sleep in their bed with them? Well, I hate to break it to you, but you killed the mood. Now that you are away, your parents are able to rediscover each other with date nights that have been upgraded from Thursdays at the local Mexican restaurant to weekend trips at B&Bs.
They party. You go to bars and your parents go to their co-worker's bunko party for the same reason: to get crunk.
They leave, never call, and treat you like you are an annoyance. Just kidding, that is how you treat them all school year until you need money.
