I have never been the person that is bitter over Valentine's Day, even before I was in a relationship. I never griped about it being a "Hallmark Holiday", I simply bought my candy on sale the day after. I was never jealous of the mushy couples arguing over who loves who more. I was never jealous of the dates, the chocolates, the flowers, the cutesy stuffed animals.
Not until this year, at least.
Valentine's Day is a day to celebrate and show off the love that people have for their significant other, a day to show just how much they mean to you with gifts and a date. I never had a "real" Valentine's Day until last year, with my boyfriend. He bought me flowers and the stuffed bear that I sleep with every night and took me on a date to Noodles and Company. This year, we will not be doing any of that. It's not because we broke up, but because we are 4,325 miles apart. Instead of going on fun dates and enjoying the day together full of gifts and kisses, we will be having our usual before-bed FaceTime date. I call him around 8:00 PM every night, which is only 4:00 PM in Hawaii-Aleutian time. I sent him his presents in the mail, which he already opened. I patiently await my package from Oahu. This is our Valentine's Day, and it most likely will be for at least the next three years.
I would be blatantly lying if I said I was not jealous of the couple's who are having "real" Valentine's celebrations. I loathe seeing snuggling couples holding hands as they walk down the street. I despise their laughs and their kisses. And yes, that is selfish of me, but on day's like the 14th of February, the distance is especially difficult. The one day of the year that I should be celebrating love with the love of my life, I cannot be. Being in a long distance relationship on Valentine's day is hard.
However, I know that I do not need a day to show my boyfriend that I love him, and I am lucky that he does not need a day to show me that he loves me, because we do that everyday. If distance teaches you one thing, it's appreciation. I do not need him to always be with me in person to feel that I am loved. The distance between us is hard, but we can and are handling just fine. It only means that in three months when I see him, it will be all the more exciting. Our Valentine's Day this year will still be great and special just like it would be any other year, even if we only get to see each other on a tiny screen. Our relationship is still worth every mile in between us.
So, if you are in a long distance relationship and find yourself saddened by Valentine's Day, I understand that it is hard. It is okay to silently curse those smoochy couples. Just remember, your relationship is worth the distance, and as each day passes, you are only getting closer to seeing one another again.
