Unhappy Single Vs Failed Relationship Lessons 6/25/18

Unhappy Single Vs. Failed Relationship Lessons

Hating being single while relationships are hard.


These past few weeks I've come across those in unsatisfactory relationships or those who've previously been in unsatisfactory relationships.

Current mainstream culture is divided into pointing out how great it is to be part of a couple and how great it is to be single. As someone who has been single the majority of my life, I find myself only seeing the downsides of being single. Those I've met recently are full of the downsides of being in a relationship.

I can't speak to experiences I've never had or experiences I only learn of in passing, but I can imagine the hardships of being or having been in bad relationships. So I can almost predict what would be said about living in a world that praises relationships when one is in or has been in nothing but bad relationships.

Being unhappily single in a world that praises being single presents unique challenges for myself since my romantic relationship experience is EXTREMELY limited whereas other single individuals have been in multiple romantic relationships that lasted for years at a time. My longest romantic relationship was only four months, so skills that others take from their romantic relationship experiences are completely lost on me. Plus, I'm Bisexual and leaning towards pursuing multiple romantic relationships instead of monogamy - so being unhappily single with coupled dreams is one of my biggest unique challenges.

I know romantic relationships can be pretty crappy, however, I also know that despite that possibility, there are things I can gain from gathering romantic relationship experiences that I want to learn.

I want to know how work to solve different conflicts, how to figure out the age-old question couples argue about what to have for dinner, how to adjust to planning one's schedule around other people instead of being spontaneous. Taking vacations together. Combining finances. Working out how to put our lives together. Working out how to keep our lives together when one of us gets a higher paying job. What if they have kids already - or we decide to have kids? Now I have to learn how to parent.

When one of us gets a job that makes us travel or has to stay long distances away, do we stay together? What happens if someone cheats? What if we have a falling out with our family? How do we celebrate holidays? If our friends fall out with us, will our spouses stop talking to them too? Do we marry - and if so, when? Who do we invite to stuff? Do we refer to each other as partners, girlfriend, boyfriend, lover, friends with benefits, spouses, or some other word? What if one of us dies?

I have no experience in figuring out these basic interpersonal skills because I've never been in a long-term romantic relationship.

Also, I want to know what its like to be loved for once. TRULY loved. Unconditionally loved. I want to be valued. To be important to someone. Not just out of respect for our relationship, but because they actually love me.

It is said that being single is beneficial because one is free to do whatever we want. We have limitless income, no attachments, and can sleep around.

The benefits the general public assumes are not actual benefits to me. I'm not free to do whatever I want. I have to work so I can pay my rent, cell phone, and electric bills. I don't have the limitless income to pay bills and partake in leisure pursuits. I don't have children, but that doesn't mean I don't anyone to care for.

I need clothes and shoes. I need intimate apparel and hygiene products. I have a cat, and he needs food and cat litter. I'm not someone who sleeps around casually; I want to be in a committed relationship before anything sexual is introduced; however, if I was one to sleep around, I'm sure that would carry a different set of challenges and assumptions to get over. I wouldn't call having the ability to sleep around or not a perk of being single, just a condition of being single.

I also must account for the criteria I want in future male and female partners standing in my way. Then, even if I'm lucky enough to find those I desire, then navigating all the relationship issues above times how many partners I end up simultaneously. We're not all going to meet at the same time, therefore we all won't be on the same escalator at once.

I wish I could be grateful that I'm not dealing with problems those in troublesome relationships deal with. I don't deal with in-laws or political differences or socioeconomic incompatibilities or parenting young children.

Yet as someone who has NEVER had to deal with these things, I still wish I could say I've experienced them.

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21 Reasons You Should Date Someone Who Was A Camp Counselor

Spouse and parent material, all wrapped up in an animal shirt, Nike shorts, and Chacos.

1. They shop at Goodwill mostly... low maintenance you could say?

SEE ALSO: The ABC's Of Summer Camp

2. They are pretty awesome at talking to parents... opening days have given good practice for them. Give them 15 minutes and they will become best friends with your parents.

3. Their best friends actually are long distance...so you can wait a while to meet their besties who will want to know everything about you and make sure your intentions are good.

4. They have learned how to look decently presentable without showering for a week... maybe two...you may or may not like this one.

5. They are always down for adventure... sure let's hike for eight miles uphill in the middle of the week!

6. They know what it is like to be woken up at 2 a.m. because someone wet their bed... mom training.

7. They also know how to give the "modest is hottest" talk to the teenage campers... and will help give you a classy future daughter.

8. Building fires is their hidden talent... if you ever get stuck on a deserted island with them they can help you.

9. Animal shirts are a common clothing item... they know how to have fun.

10. They throw killer dance parties... ones your grandma would approve of.

11. They are used to being publicly embarrassed for others (their campers') enjoyment... and usually can take a joke or prank well.

12. They also know how to prank you back... summer camp prepares you for awesome prank wars.

13. If you want to see her with no makeup on just look at her camp photos... natural beauty?

14. They actually love children... they chose to spend a whole summer loving other people's kids; imagine how awesome they will treat their own.

15. Chances are they are a really fun person and will bring out your inner child... yes, climb that random tree and paint your face because it is Wednesday.

16. Their "real job" will come later in life... they will end up being successful. Most employers love to hire former counselors, so it is not a waste of a summer.

17. They know how to hide their favorites in life really well... so if they choose to date you they are basically saying you are their favorite and that is a big deal to them.

18. They have learned how to eat unhealthy food every day for a whole summer and stay in shape... or try to at least.

19. They also are obviously not a diva when it comes to material needs...they went a whole summer without even air conditioning and never complained.

20. If they love you anything like they love their campers your needs will always be put first...they are some of the most selfless people you will ever meet.

21. They love God, living for Him, and have already made a difference in many children's lives... they are the real MVPS.

If you are still looking for a place to work this summer and love adventure, Jesus, and children, apply for Camp Crestridge for Girls; they still have many positions available. I'll be there so you should too!

If you are a boy apply for Camp Ridgecrest for Boys!

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Looking for a fright? Try "Dying Light."

Good night, good luck.


"This is Jade, get to the nearest safehouse and wait until dawn... Good night, and good luck." The radio goes off as your watch beeps. It is now 21:00, and you are in danger. In the night, things are never the same...

Dying Light is one of the most iconic zombie games of this era, featuring never before seen concepts in its genre. It also features one of the most scary features of all, drawing inspiration from Minecraft. Here are all the things that makes Dying Light terrifying. Beware, violent images ahead.

A better "Dead Island"

"Dying Light" was developed by Techland - a company famous for its prior zombie game: Dead Island. Dead Island was a hit due to its new mechanics involving heavy emphasis on melee combat and weapon crafting. This put players in a tough spot because unlike its predecessors of "Left 4 Dead" or "Killing Floor," guns are a rarity and survival depends on resourcefulness.

After the failed release of "Dead Island: Riptide" - a low effort expansion - Techland parted ways with their publisher Deep Silver, in pursuit of a game that they can formulate on their own.

Dying Light - Launch Trailer | PS4 Youtube

Flash forward to 2015, and "Dying Light" was released with massive success. It featured functions not available in "Dead Island" while debuting a new feature: parkour. Yes, you read that right, parkour.


Parkour was an interesting system to be implemented in a zombie game, but it would make total sense when you think more about it. Imagine the streets being filled with mindless zombies. One bite, and you're infected. Leave untreated, and you're gone. The rooftops is the only safe option, and you need the athleticism to scale buildings and run away from danger. In Dying Light, you're not a hunter. You're the hunted.

The night

Fear not the day, for night is your true enemy. In "Dying Light," zombies are infected with a special virus. This strain of virus is afraid of UV light, meaning that during the day, the zombies' motor functions are extremely suppressed, making them sluggish and dumb. But when night comes, the virus unleashes its full potential, turning slow zombies into athletic and crazed chasers that can pursuit you for miles at incredible speeds.

Run and pray they don't catch you Giphy

Other than that, at night, a special mutation of zombies appear called "Volatiles." They are athletically superior, incredibly strong, and are terrifying. They usually emit a gargling sound and makes clicking noises, both of which join together for a scary combo. Plus, in the night, you are vulnerable. Sneaking while watching out for monsters in the dark isn't exactly easy.

Equipped with a UV Flashlight with limited battery life, you are left with only one weapon for self-defense if you ever find yourself in a pursuit. And in all cases, just run.


"Dying Light" has an interesting approach to noise. Zombies are very sensitive to noises. A gunshot, an explosion, a car alarm, or a loud crash onto a crumbling building could attract hordes to your position. In this game, noises determine your survival at night. Know when to throw a firecracker for distraction or when to trip car alarm traps could mean the difference between surviving a night and not seeing the day.

Dying Light Noise Attracts Virals www.youtube.com

Closing words

"Dying Light" promises a unique zombie experience different from most games. It's gritty, it's scary, and it's fun - these standards are those that game developers could only dream about when designing a zombie franchise. Nothing is more bone-chilling than hearing a volatile scream as the night comes, an explosion going off nearby, or when the sun sets gently behind the slums of Harran. But zombies aren't the only threats. Humans are an entire different ball game, but that's up to you to explore.

Good night and good luck...

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