I learned from an early age that I just wasn't like the rest of my peers. I never really "fit in" and as I progressed through school, it was way more apparent. I was very easily defined as a "weirdo", a description that I now own. One thing that I was really into was going to shows, mainly hardcore, punk, and metal. I found a home in those shows that I didn't have at school or any where else. It was a place that felt so welcoming and warm and it was everything I needed. That was the one place where I felt like belonged.
Looking back I'm entirely grateful for finding that peace in shows, and I wouldn't dare change it for the world. But as I've grown older and have attended many, many shows since then I have to wonder that if I was part of today's crowd that I didn't belong in back then, would I be able to belong or feel welcome at one of those shows?
I hate to say this, but I don't think so.
One big thing I've noticed at local shows is this "too cool" attitude. You know the one that people give off when they feel as though they are better than you. And it's not something that I'm seeing from bands or fans in particular, but from all across the board. For example, even though the alternative scene boasts being yourself, there seems to be an unofficial dress code. If you don't look like the rest of the people there, you're probably going to be singled out in one way or another. It's also kind of strange for people to just talk to each other. Most people talk to the group that they came to the show with or the people that they know, but not really any one else. Now correct me if I'm wrong, but that's not welcoming at all.
Life is incredibly hard for not just the youth, but everybody. Maybe we should take a step back and look at around at the shows we attend and see what we can do to make it feel welcoming like it used to. If you see someone who looks like they are uncomfortable or out of place, bring them in. Sing with them. Dance with them. Hell, throw them in the pit. Show them that this place is theirs. It may be a big changing point in their life. After all, we all deserve to feel like we belong.
