Everyone Says Your Twenties Are For Figuring Yourself Out

I have reached a point in my life where:

a) I don't know what I am doing, but I am faking it well.

and

b) Everyone on my Facebook feed is either pregnant, engaged, or going through a mid life crisis.

Your twenties are supposed to be about self discovery. The most important thing I've discovered now that I am older is that I need to pay attention to what I wear based on what I plan to eat later that day. The other thing I have discovered is that everyone will tell you now is the time to figure your life out, but nobody can tell you how to do that, but they will be more than happy to tell you you're doing it wrong.

I have a few friends who have entered the stage of their life where they are surprised by a second line on an at home pregnancy test. Phone calls home often include a conversation where my friends and I try to count the number of babies that have resulted from our peers. What a lot of people are quick to see are the statistics, what they don't consider often enough are the lives.

I have had friends who have considered adoption, struggled with the decision to have an abortion, and a few who have become very capable mothers. Each of them put thought into their decision, they looked for advice, they struggled with the options, and they did what was best for them.

On the other hand I am entering a time when friends are deciding to tie the knot. In less than a month I will be watching a close friend of mine walk down the aisle sitting next to other close friends who couldn't be more okay with being single. What I want everyone reading this to know is that both the woman holding the bouquet and the women fighting to catch it are very happy.

Moving on to the people who litter my social media feeds with poor me's, "candid" photos, and wife me up dinner posts, well they're all trying to figure their lives out too.

The important thing to remember is that you are going to be figuring life out for the rest of your life. It isn't an age specific stage, you won't be handed a "congrats, you know what you're doing" award the night before your thirtieth birthday, and if by some stroke of luck you do know exactly what you are doing every day for the rest of your life please pretend you don't for all of us riding the struggle bus.

Now to everyone who looks at us and can't seem to comprehend how confused we are, try to remember where you were when you were twenty, and how much you needed someone to tell you "you're doing the best you can, keep it up," rather than, "why is her butt hanging out of her shorts?"

Sure, your twenties are a time where you will figure a lot out. Figure out who your friends are and forgive yourself for letting some go. Figure out what activities you love and take the time to do them. Figure out where you want to be and what you love about where you are now. Figure out what foods you enjoy, what type of dress looks best on you, what your go to snack is when the guys come over for Super Bowl Sunday. And always have a few inspirational quotes on hand for when you can't figure it out anymore.

"Nothing will ruin your 20’s more than thinking you should have your life together already."