You see, people like me often keep everything bottled up. Yes, you share most things with your best friend or your close sibling, but there are still always things that you keep formulating in your mind and never truly articulate to someone.
It is one of the worst feelings ever. I do mean ever. I am not simply using it as a way to exaggerate my statement. It is one of the worst feelings, and I have broken my leg and arm and this by far tops it all. For those of us that don’t open up about our feelings, it hurts even more because we end up carrying that weight on our shoulders through each of the precious moments in our lives. With so much going on in our mind, we don’t feel right sharing it all with those that are close to us as we don’t want to be annoying or seem like we are always complaining, so thus we hold it in and make it that much harder for us to move on.
I am a true believer of the phrase “everything happens for a reason.” Strange things have happened that have made me realize the validity of that statement, but that's a completely different story for another time. Everything in our lives is a roller-coaster ride; the good and the bad all impact us somehow. You should never feel as though your time with the person has gone to waste. Yes, at the moment it hurts to think that what you pictured in your head this entire time was a falsely perceived future, and you might feel as though you could have been with someone else during this time. You could have put your heart out to someone who was in the right state to receive it and have had it reciprocated back; then again this didn’t happen in this particular case and while it is natural to feel nostalgic and regretful, nothing can be undone. God, for some reason, chose for you two to cross paths.
A lot of times, we might meet an amazing person, but the timing is just not right. Meeting them in the strangest of circumstances and clicking with them and feeling like you have known them forever happens. Also, when I say the most amazing person, I don’t by any means mean someone that is perfect. There is no such thing! To think this way is to be blinded. Each one of us has flaws. What makes certain relationships, romantic or simply platonic, special and difficult to overcome is knowing that despite each others' flaws there is a deep connection and certain feelings shared. So, when things don’t work out in these situations it's especially hard to come to grips with them.
The issue as I stated before is timing. You might be mature and know exactly what you want out of life and the people around you, but it is faulty to assume that they do too. They might have realized they met an incredibly unique and sweet person that is capable of changing their life, but maybe they are not ready for change or are scared of the idea. As I write this, for the sake of my positivity and progression, I have to just learn to accept this fact. Like it or not, everything happens for a reason. In the meantime, live your life and attain your goals and simply allow things to naturally unfold how they are supposed to occur.
Never forget that statement. No matter how things might have ended, good or bad, learn from it. One of my favorite things about life is that it's dynamic, always changing and never being quite the same. Learn to be dynamic. Adapt to change. Change is scary but inevitable. We often give the word "change" a negative connotation. “If I change myself, I am not being my genuine self. That is wrong!” Change doesn’t have to make you inauthentic. By the word change, I mean improve yourself. Learn from your past and from your mistakes. Relationships involve two people, thus it is incorrect to blame the downfall on only one person. Both people are somehow at fault because as I said previously no one is perfect. Understanding where you can improve will lead you to learn to constantly improve yourself. Instead of laying in bed crying and reminiscing by listening to sentimental songs, learn to be a better person for tomorrow, because as cheesy as it might sound, you don’t know what tomorrow might hold. Distract yourself and surround yourself with a positive, uplifting attitude.
