I always joke around and say that I'm 30 years old when it comes to the people my age. I always feel like the mom or the "boring" one because I make different decisions and want different things. Although I've become quite content with my way of thinking, I sometimes have to remind myself that there is absolutely nothing wrong with the way I think or the decisions I make.

When it comes to the activities I choose to be get involved in, they may be different than what the average college student does. While my peers would rather be out partying, going to clubs and meeting new guys/girls, I would much rather be hanging out at home with some friends and actually getting to talk to each other instead of screaming over loud music about absolutely nothing.

When I do end up going out, I often find myself babysitting and making sure everyone makes it home, instead of making sure I have a good time. Too many times, I've been out and I want to leave a party, but because I drove everyone, I ignore what I want and don't ask them to leave just because I'm not having fun.

After parties, I hear a lot of stories about people hooking up. I don't have much to say because I know that's not something I do. I know that in most situations, it doesn't make anyone feel any better once they realize what has happened, and I don't want to feel like that. Of course, everyone loves attention, but I love attention from someone who I know actually cares about me and who I am as a person, not someone who just wants me because they think I'm pretty or because they like my body or because I'm good enough for the night.

This way of thinking also comes into play when it comes to dating. I don't want to date someone just because I'm lonely or want attention. It's much more important to me to be with someone who pushes me to my fullest potential, appreciates my mind, accepts me as I am, helps guide me closer to God personally, is proud of me and my accomplishments, supports my dream etc. the list goes on and on. But, the main point is, I don't want just any guy that wants me. So, until someone meets the standards on my list, I'd rather stay single.

I also watch people get caught up in meaningless drama. There are many times that people create it themselves, and then get upset because they're stressed out or got their feelings hurt. Now, personally I am a very dramatic person and I know that (when I say I'm dramatic, I mean that I'm just extra when it comes to my emotions). I don't like to get caught up in drama that shouldn't even exist or the petty drama that exists in girl world. I don't have time for it nor is it going to push me in the direction that my life is headed. I think the mark of maturity is when you finally realize that not everything that happens needs a reaction. Sometimes, the reaction of silence is all a situation needs to make it go away.

As I write this, I realize that these are the things I find myself saying to my friends and those around me when I hear all the crazy stories that I hear. Not only do I preach these things to others, but I constantly preach them to myself when I start to think about the things I'm "missing out on". Since I carry myself in this manner, it does separate me from people and I do get left out.

I know those who do make the decisions that I choose not to don't want to feel judged, but when I talk about these things, I don't want anyone to feel as if I'm judging them. I only share these things because I want the people around me to understand how I look at these actions and respect the decisions I make. I want my friends to see where I'm coming from so they can better understand me as a an individual.

I don't expect everyone to understand because I know that we as humans only understand things to the capacity at which we allow ourselves to think, but those who do understand where I'm coming from are the one's who respect me and I respect them. I like that I choose to be well respected and valued for who I am over someone liking me because I do what everyone else does. Although, I feel alone sometimes, I know that's not true because I have God and those few special people I can turn to when I need a pick me up and a little reminder that it's okay to think the way that I do, and for that I am eternally grateful.