To The Person Who Constantly Gives

To The Person Who Constantly Gives

I let people walk all over me, I let people push me around, I let people treat me less than I deserve.
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I am the most loving, understanding, forgiving individual I know. I care about the people I love so much and refuse to give up on them regardless of the circumstances that arise.

I often times put the needs of others I love and care about before my own. Making other people happy is a key component of who I am, and as much as I try to live for myself, I catch myself sacrificing my own happiness to better that of someone else’s’. This becomes very toxic over time and it is something I struggle with.

If at any point in time I cared deeply about you whether it be a friendship or a relationship, I will do anything in my power to make sure you feel loved and reassured at all times.

I give until I can no longer give any more. I will pour so much love and energy into another person even if it drains and exhausts me to no end.

In the past I never expected people to be able to do for me what I was able to do for them. One day I came to the conclusion that no matter how much effort I put into somebody, I have to know in my heart that they will not do the same for me.

I became so comfortable with the idea of giving my all and receiving nothing in return.

I let people walk all over me, I let people push me around, I let people treat me less than I deserve. I no longer want to accept that in my life.

College has taught me to not waste time on anything or anybody. I have had enough of allowing less than I deserve into my life in any aspect.

If I do not see you as a positive person that will encourage me and uplift me, I do not need you in my life. If I am not learning any lessons from you or feel you are benefiting my growth in any way, I do not need you as a friend.

I make the conscious effort to only spend my time and energy on people that will make me a better person as a result of surrounding myself with them.

If you are the person that does not benefit my growth and mental health in any way, I will still treat you with kindness and respect but I will not go out of my way for you. Not anymore.

I was so blind and forgot about my own happiness on countless occasions and pushed everything I knew I deserved out of the picture because I was so content with doing what I could to make other people happy.

Making others feel good still brings me so much happiness, but there is a toxic and non-toxic way to do so. I can still help and encourage others and pour my time and energy into people, I just have to be aware of who is good for me and who is going to harm me.

To the person who constantly gives… I know how difficult it is. We are strong and we are able to give our all to anybody we wish, but we need to start thinking about ourselves more.

We need to remind ourselves what we actually deserve to put up with. It is not a matter of if we are capable of putting up with toxic people because we know we can. We take the challenge and run with it, but it is time to slow down and step back.

Let’s stop giving our all to everybody and become more selective so we no longer have to hurt ourselves in the process.

Cover Image Credit: Unsplash

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50 Things To Be Happy About

It's the little things in life.
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It is always easier to pick out the negatives in life. We tend to dwell on them and drown out the happy moments. I asked a friend to tell me something that made them happy. They sarcastically laughed at my question then thought about it for a minute. Nothing. But they could easily come up with things that made them unhappy. Then I read them my list, and they were smiling and laughing in agreement the whole time. There are so many more things to be happy and laugh about than we realize. After all- it's the little things in life that can mean the most! Here are 50 things that make me happy. What are your 50?

  1. The first warm day of the year
  2. Laughing so hard your abs ache
  3. Freshly washed sheets
  4. Looking through old pictures
  5. The smell of a coffee shop
  6. Eating cookie dough
  7. Reading a bible verse that perfectly fits your current situation
  8. Seeing someone open a gift you got them
  9. Eating birthday cake
  10. A shower after a long day
  11. Marking something off your to-do list
  12. Drinking ice cold water on a really hot day
  13. Dressing up for no reason
  14. Breakfast food
  15. Being able to lay in bed in the morning
  16. Finding something you love at the store
  17. And it’s on sale
  18. Cute elderly couples
  19. When a stranger compliments you
  20. Getting butterflies in your stomach
  21. Taking a nap
  22. Cooking something delicious
  23. Being lost for words
  24. Receiving a birthday card in the mail
  25. And there's money in it
  26. Finally cleaning your room
  27. Realizing how fortunate you are
  28. Waking up from a nightmare and realizing it wasn't real
  29. Fresh fruit
  30. Walking barefoot in the grass
  31. Singing along to a song in the car
  32. Sunrises
  33. Sunsets
  34. Freshly baked cookies with a glass of milk
  35. Summertime cookouts
  36. Feeling pretty
  37. Looking forward to something
  38. Lemonade
  39. Comfortable silences
  40. Waking up in the middle of the night and realizing you have more time to sleep
  41. Surviving another school year
  42. The cold side of the pillow
  43. The smell of popcorn
  44. Remembering something funny that happened
  45. Laughing to yourself about it
  46. Feeling weird about laughing to yourself
  47. Printed photographs
  48. Wearing a new outfit
  49. The sound of an ice cream truck
  50. Feeling confident
Cover Image Credit: Tumblr

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I Stopped Wearing Makeup For A Week And I've Never Felt More Confident

You don't need makeup to look and feel beautiful if you don't want to.

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I began wearing makeup in middle school for special occasions. Whenever there was a school dance, I'd don on some mascara and I would feel beautiful. This continued until the end of my sophomore year of high school when I decided that putting on makeup would become part of my everyday morning routine. Eventually, wearing makeup was something people expected to see rather than something that I wore on occasion.

Things stayed the same until my freshman year of college. There were some days during my first year in college that I couldn't be bothered to wear makeup, because I was in a rush. However, whenever these days occurred, I usually had friends ask me why I was so tired and if everything was okay. I have prominent bags under my eyes that I usually cover up with a concealer, and though I slept enough and tried many remedies, they just wouldn't disappear. Without my makeup though, my friends were concerned and thought that something might be wrong. While they had good intentions, I thought that I must not look good without my makeup.

From then on, I started wearing makeup every day, no matter what. If I went to grab some food quick, I had to wear makeup. Review session for math on Saturday in the morning? Makeup. Volunteering for a club? Makeup. Class? Makeup, always makeup. If there was any chance that I would run into someone that I knew I had to put on makeup because I felt that I would be judged and wanted to look my best at all times.

When I started taking an 8 a.m. class this semester, something changed.

One day, I was running late and was rushing to get to my class on time. I didn't have time to put on any makeup before class. At first, I was self-conscious without any makeup covering up my circles and I felt naked. I thought that people would notice, but I don't think that anyone even noticed. The following week, I had exams and felt that getting a few more minutes of sleep was much more satisfying than putting on makeup, so I went without any makeup that week. At first, I was still self-conscious of not having anything on my face to cover up the imperfections, but as the week wore on, I felt free. Without any makeup, I never had to take any off at night. Normally my mascara takes forever to get off, which is a hassle. Also, I felt that without the makeup, I felt like I looked better over time. I was more confident about how I looked with and without the makeup.

Since that fateful week of not wearing makeup, I've found that not wearing any makeup to be extremely freeing. While I do still sometimes put it on, it is no longer a necessity. If you wear makeup constantly, I suggest trying to go without wearing makeup for a few days. There's nothing wrong with wearing makeup, and there also isn't anything wrong with not wearing makeup either.

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