Hey, it's me again. The voice in the back of your head that always whispers the harsh truths that you would rather not hear. I know you've done a pretty good job of ignoring me, hushing me, even trying to convince me that I'm wrong. Your heart has played the devil's advocate, excusing the facts your mind has come to. Sometimes you have to silence what the heart pleads for and listen to the certainty of your head.
Everyone has their downfalls. There is not a single person who does not battle some kind of demon. You will never find someone who is completely perfect or never has a bad day. But, everyone has limits of what they can put up with. You know your limits. You don't have to sacrifice yourself just so you're not alone at the end of the day. Compromising your wants and needs just to have someone is doubting your own strength.
Maybe you're comfortable and you've been together a long time. Sure you're not madly in love, but they are a part of your routine. Just like clockwork you can expect a phone call or dinner at the table. It would be a lot of work and change at this point to give it up and you just don't want to mess with it. You're not extremely happy but hey, at least you're not extremely unhappy. Being neutral and passive is not terms for ones in love. If they don't set your soul on fire and give a new meaning to waking up, what are you doing? Why are you selling yourself short?
You could even love them to the point of forever. They are your home, they are the only thing you know in this world. But what about the nights he drinks so much his words slur and his voice raises? What about the weekends she disappears and you pray to see headlights in the driveway. How many excuses can you make in your head before it explodes? If you prayed for a man that has a godly soul but sit in the pew alone, what are you doing? You cannot count on changing someone. In fact, when you love someone you shouldn't want to see them change. If you give up major beliefs for love, resentment will follow.
I know it's scary. Sometimes were afraid to let go because we wonder if we will ever find it again. Starting again is frustrating. But would you rather be frustrated for a chapter in your life or the rest of the book? Be strong enough to move on and patient enough to know that your one is out there. You only waste heartache entertaining ones whom you know isn't the one you've been looking for.
Think of it like this: No one throws pennies in the fountain thinking "I hope I find someone that isn't everything I've ever dreamed of!"
