To the Mom Who Did It All 20+ Years Later

To the Mom Who Did It All 20+ Years Later

This is the congratulations that you deserve. The thank you for showing me that no matter what life throws at you and no matter how tough things may get, that you can still find some way to push through it all and come out stronger.
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You didn’t have the normal life; graduate 8th grade, go off to high school, then graduate and go to college, meet a guy, fall in love, and start a family. Instead, your family started in high school. There was no graduating and college. No perfect guy. You had your first kid when you were still one yourself. That’s one of the biggest challenges you encountered that caused you to start the life everyone leads 20 years later.

You then met my father and got pregnant with me. That postponed whatever opportunity you may have had to pick back up the lasso and get back on the horse. However, you did it anyway. You still had me. Rather than trying to take the life that others deemed right, you choose me; you got on a different horse.

I know it was never easy for you. While you may have come and gone in your first two children’s lives, you came around when things were right. Yeah, there were bumps in the road and during those tough times you weren’t as present and even though that hurt at times, I knew there was part of you with me and that you were trying to do what was best for you which ultimately would be best for your children. Then came my half brother.

Seeing him be the motivator and the apple of your eye made me happy. To see you finally have that drive within you made me proud. Even though you may have had a couple bad seeds looting the garden which caused about a year set back total, you still did it.

So this one is for you. To the mom who did it all 20+ years later.

I am so proud of you. To see all those tough times you went through in life and to see you now, I am thrilled to see you finally be who you are. That you finally overcame all those things and people who were holding you back and get what you deserved.

I cannot believe how happy I am for you. How happy I am that you dropped that 200 pounds of weight and got your degree instead. That you persevered and pulled through when only a few of us knew you could.

So, this is the congratulations that you deserve. The thank you for showing me that no matter what life throws at you and no matter how tough things may get, that you can still find some way to push through it all and come out stronger.

“So mom. I am extremely sorry that I wasn’t able to get out of work and be there for your big day. I just wanted to let you know how proud I am of you. These past few years have had their ups and downs yet you never let that tear you away from school and chasing what you wanted. You persevered in way that I admire. I know it has been tough but you did it. You did it, mom, and I could not be more thrilled and happy for you. I know you’ll continue to be strong and I know you’ll find an amazing job and won’t stop till you do because that’s who you are. You’re someone who doesn’t stop. You don’t stop fighting. Don’t ever lose that. I am so proud of you. Smile big and proud, you deserve this.”

You waited 20+ years to start and finish your education. I can’t wait to see you prove to those who thought you couldn’t do it that it doesn’t matter when you get it done, that you can do amazing either way. I love you, mom. Keep your head up and keep moving forward. Be proud to look people in the eye and say, “I did it”.

Cover Image Credit: UC Magazine

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I'm A Woman And You Can't Convince Me Breastfeeding In Public Is OK In 2019

Sorry, not sorry.

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Lately, I have seen so many people going off on social media about how people shouldn't be upset with mothers breastfeeding in public. You know what? I disagree.

There's a huge difference between being modest while breastfeeding and just being straight up careless, trashy and disrespectful to those around you. Why don't you try popping out a boob without a baby attached to it and see how long it takes for you to get arrested for public indecency? Strange how that works, right?

So many people talking about it bring up the point of how we shouldn't "sexualize" breastfeeding and seeing a woman's breasts while doing so. Actually, all of these people are missing the point. It's not sexual, it's just purely immodest and disrespectful.

If you see a girl in a shirt cut too low, you call her a slut. If you see a celebrity post a nude photo, you call them immodest and a terrible role model. What makes you think that pulling out a breast in the middle of public is different, regardless of what you're doing with it?

If I'm eating in a restaurant, I would be disgusted if the person at the table next to me had their bare feet out while they were eating. It's just not appropriate. Neither is pulling out your breast for the entire general public to see.

Nobody asked you to put a blanket over your kid's head to feed them. Nobody asked you to go feed them in a dirty bathroom. But you don't need to basically be topless to feed your kid. Growing up, I watched my mom feed my younger siblings in public. She never shied away from it, but the way she did it was always tasteful and never drew attention. She would cover herself up while doing it. She would make sure that nothing inappropriate could be seen. She was lowkey about it.

Mindblowing, right? Wait, you can actually breastfeed in public and not have to show everyone what you're doing? What a revolutionary idea!

There is nothing wrong with feeding your baby. It's something you need to do, it's a part of life. But there is definitely something wrong with thinking it's fine to expose yourself to the entire world while doing it. Nobody wants to see it. Nobody cares if you're feeding your kid. Nobody cares if you're trying to make some sort of weird "feminist" statement by showing them your boobs.

Cover up. Be modest. Be mindful. Be respectful. Don't want to see my boobs? Good, I don't want to see yours either. Hard to believe, I know.

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Here's What Happens When All Of Your Friends Have Babies

All of my friends back home are married with children. No, really, they are.

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Over the past few months, three of my friends have shared their pregnancy news with me, and I couldn't be more thrilled. Baby news always stirs up a range of emotions for me. I'm excited and crying happy tears (no joke, I started to cry when my best friend told me and showed me her ultrasound).

Being "Auntie Meg" brings me such great joy. You see, I absolutely adore children, especially my friend's kiddos. They can easily brighten up my day with their giggles, love you, and their goodbye kisses & waves. I absolutely love getting to be "Auntie Meg"; it could potentially be my favorite role to fill.

I don't think I've ever loved human beings more than I love these babies. These are kiddos I would do almost anything for; they truly have my whole heart and I couldn't be more thankful for each and every one of them. I've loved getting to watch my friends grow into incredible parents.

I love getting to be one of the biggest cheerleaders for my friends and their kids. Listen, I can't wait for the day when they are older and are asking to come over more and spend time doing fun things with auntie Meg. I can't wait to watch them grow and I can't wait to be able to come alongside them and be a shoulder to cry on and one of the loudest voices cheering them on (Next to mom and dad, of course).

While there is just so much good about your friends growing up and having children of their own, if you are not careful, it can also fuel a person's self-doubt.

It can bring up questions like, "am I good enough?", "what is wrong with me?", "why am I not where they are at?" I would be lying if I said that I have never thought or felt these things, but here's the thing: you are good enough, there is absolutely nothing wrong with you, and their path is not your path; you will get there when you get there.

Those things are so important to remember in times when you begin to doubt yourself or your worth.

Believe me, you are good enough, there is nothing wrong with you, and that is not the path you need to be on at the moment. This is a great time for you to focus on you and the things you want out of life. What are your goals? What is on your bucket list? Just because you don't have the things your friends have, doesn't make your life any less fulfilled than theirs is. Your life is just as wonderful and fulfilling as theirs is, just in different ways.

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