You really don't. You don't have to pit yourself against other women you see as competition. You don't have to come up with irrelevant reasons to dislike that girl because "something about her is off." You don't have to be paranoid and think that women are all out to get each other. It's these thoughts and the behaviors they cause that create the problem.
I've been lucky to not have many encounters with mean girls in my life. I have very rarely, actually. I am in no way minimizing women to that one trait, either. But there is always that person who is going through just the right amount of misunderstood pain that she tends to take it out on someone else who doesn't deserve it.
We're all on the same team here.
I genuinely want every person I meet to be happy. I don't know why I always see the good in people, but I have never been one to take offense to someone snapping because they're having a bad day/week/year. I get it. I always try to put myself in the shoes of the other person. This is the best way I've found to deal with the people who jump to anger instead of kindness.
So to the women who feel they need to pit themselves against other women, I understand where you're coming from. I wish you didn't feel that you had to be cruel in order to feel better about yourself. I wish you also knew that I'll never be hurt or take offense to your actions. Just know the girls you put down for a laugh are not the enemy here.
You don't have to tell all your friends how awful that woman is when you don't even know her. You'll get no personal gain. In fact it is so damaging for you. You don't want to begin to obsess and drive yourself crazy thinking about this woman or that woman and why she gave you "that look" when it's most likely all in your head. There are so many more positive things you could be doing than constantly overthinking and plotting.
No one should bully anyone. Imagine how much easier life would be if people weren't preoccupied with tearing one another down for no reason. Not everyone is going to be best friends with everyone, I know. But there is still this thing called "support" where we can encourage one another as women to follow our passions and stand up for what we believe in--no matter how different they may be from our own.
It breaks my heart that in this day and age women are still saying that "this woman is better than that one" because she's "prettier" or "smarter" ...it's unnecessary.
We are all on the same side.
