A year ago, I found myself wondering what was wrong with me and why I wasn’t good enough. There were many nights that I kept my best friend up, venting to her about my feelings for the guy that I had been crazy over for what felt like forever that showed no interest in me. I had met him at church a couple of years prior, and he was perfect to me. I stayed up into late hours of the night thinking of things that I could change about myself that might make him like me. It got to the point where I had completely tore myself down over him, and most nights all I could do was lay in bed and cry.

Then, one night, reality hit me that it just wasn’t meant to be. He wasn’t the one and I needed to move on. I began praying, and as I was praying and I just asked God to make sure he ended up with someone that cared about him as much as I cared about him, regardless if that was me or not. That was the night that I realized that it was possible to truly love someone, even if they had never actually been “yours." That was the night that things started getting better. For the next couple of weeks I no longer searched for flaws in myself that might turn guys away. Instead I thought of positive qualities that I possessed that one day a man would long to have in a wife. I no longer stayed up late at night crying to my best friend because he didn’t love me back. I started loving myself, flaws and all and I realized that I didn’t need a guy to love me to be happy.

I spent the next few months building myself back up. I took the heartache, the doubts and the negative thoughts that I was previously feeling and I taught myself a lot. I had redirected all of my efforts into myself. I began to love myself and believing that I was better than good enough. I taught myself that although you shouldn’t ever give up on something that you want, you have to hand the reigns over to God once it begins to have a negative impact on your life. I realized that no one was worth my tears, ever. I finally reached a point, probably one of the highest points I’ve ever had in my life, where absolutely nothing could bring me down. I loved myself, everyone in my life, and I had placed God back on top where He belonged.

And that’s when it happened. God had answered the prayers that I had spent years praying. God chose me to be the girl to make the boy I had once been head over heels for happy. Days turned into weeks which turned into months. It shocked me. Honestly to this day it still shocks me. But, God always has a reason behind His timing, and it’s always perfect.

I say all of this to tell you that if you have been investing so much time and effort into a guy who doesn’t give you the time or day or seem to acknowledge your effort, maybe it’s time to redirect your effort into something else. Just because it’s not happening at the moment, doesn’t mean it won’t ever happen. Maybe, it's truly not meant to be. But maybe it is. Realize this and accept the unknown. This doesn’t mean that you aren’t perfect the way you are. There's nothing wrong with you. And your happiness and self worth should not be based solely off of someone else. And when the time is right, the right guy will come into your life and you’ll forget all about the ups and downs and the effort put into guys in the past. We aren’t supposed to question God’s timing. You never know the reasons He may be withholding something or someone from you. But we should always keep in mind that it is for the good for us in the end.

And to the girls who maybe don’t have a guy in mind that they are crazy over, but just wonder if Mr. Right will ever come along, I promise he will. God has perfect timing for everything. One day, when the time is right, He will send the perfect guy into your life to sweep you off of your feet and the wait will have been so worth it. I know that it’s so easy to grow impatient and begin to doubt yourself and tear yourself down, but when He does send you the one, you'll forget all about the wait.

Prior, I had spent so much time praying to God for what I wanted, but I never prayed asking for God to do in my life what was most beneficial for me. I never stepped back and handed God the reigns really. Instead I just kept praying that He would make him mine. Looking back I thank God for His timing. Although in the moment it was rough, and I was constantly questioning God, it has been worth the wait. Maybe I thought I was ready for a relationship, but God was still working in me and preparing me for one. Or maybe it was him. Who knows.

For me it was a combination of investment, effort, and doubt. I spent three years pouring into my (now) boyfriend, and believing that I was going to be single for the rest of my life — even if I was only 15 years old at the time (I was a little dramatic in high school). Me and him have been dating for almost six months, and have talked every day for almost 11 months. Instead of praying at night asking God why he couldn’t be mine, I now pray to God thanking Him for blessing me with him. He blessed me when I wasn’t expecting it, and I wouldn’t change a thing. He'll bless you too, right when you least expect it.