"You will have a husband. God will give you an amazing husband."

I heard something in my head say "no".

She continued to go on "God knows the desires of your heart and He will bless you with a man, if you only wait."

That sounded good. I mean, good because there's a happy ending, not necessarily good in terms of the whole "waiting" part. But something else was wrong with what the woman was saying. I thought about the sentence again. "God will bless you with a man." Then it hit me. It hit me harder than a ton of bricks, because it was so blunt and truthful that it left a mark on the way I thought from that day on.

Who says God wants me to have a husband?

I mean yes, marriage is a huge blessing, but it's a blessing all the same. You cannot expect a blessing to be given to you just because it's been given to others. God Doesn't owe us anything. Marriage is absolutely beautiful and as Jesus said in Galatians "It is not good that a man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.” Those words are still true, but God also called one of his disciples, Paul, to remain single his whole life. In fact, Paul seemed to be pretty content with that calling. He even says in 1st Corinthians "Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I do."

I can hear all the girls who are reading this right now. You are probably sitting here about to vomit at the thought of never walking down an aisle in a white dress to a man who looks at you as though you've hung the stars themselves. I need you to listen when I say, don't worry about it. It's not your job to worry about it. I'm not saying you're never going to get married.. but I'm also not saying you are.

In fact, I think that's why God laid it on Paul's heart to remain single. In Corinthians, it says, "The unmarried or celibate woman cared for the Lord's business; her aim is to be dedicated to him in body, as in spirit; but the married woman cares for worldly things; her aim is to please her husband. In saying this I have no wish to keep you on a tight reign. I am thinking simply of your own good, of what is seemingly, and of your freedom to wait upon the Lord without distraction."

Nowadays we speak of marriage as though it's something that's promised to us. So we spend every day of our lives, that we aren't married, worrying about how we can become married. So in short, we spend most of our days with "distraction", just like Paul urges us to rid ourselves of. We tell girls to wait and wait and wait for their husband, but as hard as it is to swallow, what if God can better use them without a man in their lives?

What if His plan isn't for them to get married?

What if they realized that a calling to be single in their life might be a real possibility and maybe they'd quit spending all their time refreshing their feeds to see if any new guys liked their Instagram photos and they would end up opening a bible to read a letter or two from their First Love instead?

Or what if simply encouraging them to pursue their King and urging them to recognize what we're really alive for ends up setting them on fire for Christ, and what if meanwhile a man who is also burning bright for Jesus spots the light in that girl and introduces himself?

You see, by encouraging girls to wait on someone we never know to truly becoming would distract them from the God that we know for a fact IS coming back for us. Literally, on a white horse.

My absolute role model Elisabeth Elliot shook my world with these words speaking about the calling of a single life: "No Christian ought to put himself outside the possibility that this is his assignment. The claims must be considered."

Isaiah 54:5 says "Your husband is your maker, whose name is the Lord of hosts." So, Would it be enough for you to only be betrothed to your maker? Would His love be enough for you? Or let me put it this way, would love Himself be enough for you? If God called you into a life of singleness to better glorify Him, would you resist His will?

Ouch. I know.

I had to ask myself these questions too. I am not saying I don't long for marriage. What girl doesn't? I am just saying that by placing my affections in other people's hands instead of placing them at God's feet sounds like a huge mistake to me. Think about it. If you are placing every good and bad feeling, every worry, and every thought at God's feet you are signing yourself up for victory. You are giving God complete control and handing Him the reigns even in the way you think about things. God's ways are always higher. He is always sovereign. His love will never fail. But, if you're daily placing your affections in a hinting tweet or a sloppy text or a conveniently listening ear, you're making a pitiful trade.

One day IF a man does go to God for your heart, as God allows him, he will find all of your affections hidden there as well. How beautiful is that? God wants you to be joyful, but He wants you to find it in Himself first and foremost. Focus on Jesus. Wait on his word daily, not a man. I know I've told you before to wait for the right man and I mean that wholeheartedly, but I believe that the right man will make his way into your life when you aren't waiting on him and you're focusing on Jesus. Focus on His love for you because you're already His bride. If He chooses to give you a husband here on earth, then He will do so. He will make it happen. Rest in the fact that there is nothing you can do to stop His will. If it's gonna happen it will, but in the meantime take a moment to recognize that's not why you're here. Chase after Jesus. Let him orchestrate the rest.

You don't have to wait for His love.