I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
Marvelous are Your works,
And that my soul knows very well.
--Psalm 139:14
What a big universe we live in, and how small you might feel. You carry the weight of the world on your shoulders, and carry others' as well, but you cannot catch the break you want. You need someone to voluntarily take some of your heavy load, but the way you want life to be is not the way it always is.
Past relationships did not work in your favor, and now you are pessimistic about your future and who might be a part of it. You are scared to get to know anyone new, for you were comfortable with the last person you were with, and do not want to feel like you wasted valuable time. Getting to know someone unfamiliar and having to open up again in ways you feel vulnerable does not seem ideal for you. I assure you though, that the person who is made for you is not going to make you feel lousy like you might have previously. They will accept every part of you, and you'll wonder why you had any apprehensions in the first place.
You are fearfully and wonderfully made. You have so much going for you, and you never give yourself the amount of credit that you deserve. Focus on what makes you beautiful, inside and out, and what makes you incredibly unique. You are impeccable, and you don't strike others as weak. They admire you for your heart and your passions for love and life. Even though others may not see that you have an anxious heart that fears a future relationship, you exhibit a person who they look to for guidance. You have worried about everyone else far more than you have worried about yourself, and it is time to make a change. Don't ever perceive yourself as undesirable. Walk throughout life with the confidence, knowing that you are forever loved and adored for who you are.
There will never come a time that you will not be able to find love and support waiting around the corner for you. Do not be anxious that your "one" won't come for you. No timing is perfect. Sitting around awaiting that day or moment will only make matters worse. Your paths will cross when that timing is right. Focus on you, your friendships, your family, your job, and everything else in between you have going on at the present time. Once you are the best version of yourself that you love, adore, and believe in, you'll know when the right person comes along, and your anxious heart will cease to bother you.
