To The Girl Who Is Striving For Perfection

To The Girl Who Is Striving For Perfection

Redifine your definition of perfecton

To the girl who is a perfectionist,

Stop defining yourself by your ability to control your environment and current situation. Stop trying to strive for perfection where it can never be reached.

Many people dream of it and some people even appear to be it, but the reality is that the idea of perfection is an allusion which can never be grasped. Life is too messy and complicated to strive for perfection. In our humanity, we may be able to imagine what true perfection is like but we will never be able to achieve it. Finally realizing this frees us from straining and wasting our lives for a mirage of flawlessness. Instead, we should embrace our imperfections.

Bad hair day? No problem, the girl beside you had three this week. Forgot about that assignment? That's ok, you get a drop grade. Gained some weight from the holiday goodies? You are still the perfectly beautiful self you were before. Didn't get the job that you wanted? Thankfully, your identity isn't defined by how "put together" your life is. You define who you are not your circumstances or your ability to achieve what society defines as perfection.

Instead of wearing yourself thin trying to satisfy an unrealistic definition of an unrealistic word, seek the One who is perfect. Jesus has already reached perfection so we are free to embrace our flaws. Stop letting your "OCD" or desire to please everyone drive you. Simply let Jesus love you for your imperfect self.

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12 Ways To Be Kinder To Yourself, Because You Deserve It

By putting these few things into practice you'd be surprised how much easier life will get.

When you're in college, it can be hard to find ways to be kind to ourselves. Our schedules are booked, there's always something we should be studying for, and life gets overwhelming. We put so much stress on ourselves when that's actually not benefiting us at all. Here are just a few ways you can be kinder to yourself and reduce stress in your life.

1. Stop talking yourself down.

It's really easy to let self-doubt take over and think negative thoughts. That's not helping anyone though, so stop talking yourself down. Be confident in who you are. You cannot improve if you're caught up in your head anyways, so do yourself a favor and cut it out.

2. Give yourself alone time.

Even if you're not an introvert, you can still benefit from taking time aside for yourself. Alone time allows you to reflect and relax. Most people aren't 100% introverts or 100% extroverts, so everyone needs a little time to their self.

3. Set time aside to do things you enjoy.

Find your hobby or your passion and actually set time aside to pursue it. If your hobby is a musical instrument or sport, block out time every week to practice. If your hobby is Netflix, no worries, you can fit that in easily.

4. Exercise, but not too much.

It's important to stay fit and active, but it's also important to do it in moderation. Don't overdo it or you'll end up with an injury, and that's not very kind to your body.

5. Nourish your body.

No matter how busy you are, you need to eat. Trust me, I understand how hard this can be with a busy schedule, but breakfast and lunch are still meals! Give your body the fuel it needs to make it through the day.

6. Drink at least 60 oz of water a day.

You'd be surprised how much your health can improve by just drinking water. I'm serious, your skin, your hair, your entire body will reap the benefits if you just try to drink 60 oz a day.

7. Treat yourself occasionally.

Whether it's an actual treat like ice cream or buying that pair of shoes you've been eyeing for the past month or so, treat yourself once in a while. You deserve it.

8. Spend time with people who uplift you.

Surround yourself with people who uplift you and make you feel good about yourself. Don't waste your time around toxic people-- just eliminate them from your life. Life's too short for bad friends.

9. Stop procrastinating.

Procrastination is all fun and games until it's the night before your midterm and you haven't studied at all. Plan ahead so you don't go into major stress-mode.

10. Give yourself a day off.

In college, we tend to live a go-go-go lifestyle. We study and work hard all week long and then party it up on the weekends. Between school, Greek life, school clubs, work, and friends, we are really busy. When you get a chance to have a day to just relax, take advantage of it. They don't come very often.

11. Organize your life.

An effective organizational system will save you so much time, energy, and stress. Having a planner or bullet journal will really help you stay on top of your life.

12. Don't sweat the small stuff.

Your formal dress isn't here yet and there are only two days until formal? No biggie. Relax. Sometimes things that seem super stressful and important in the moment just don't matter in the grand scheme of life. Your formal dress will either come in on time or someone will let you borrow one of their old ones. Life goes on. I'm still working on this one, myself.

By putting these few things into practice you'd be surprised how much easier life will get. Be kind to yourself. Life is short.

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First, Love Yourself

You should be your own first priority.

Do you ever going through your daily life and daily tasks and realize you’re doing so many things for other people but really not any for yourself? Helping a friend with homework, driving a friend to the grocery store, working on a project for a team, etc. Don’t get me wrong helping others is a great habit to get into, and something I really enjoy doing when I invest my time in others. However, you can’t forget to invest time in yourself too.

I recently got away from this personal investment. I’m a people pleaser, and I like taking time out of my day to benefit the lives of others in any way that I can. It brings me happiness in seeing the joy I can bring out in others, and I like being the person that people always know they can count on.

But, because of this, there have been times when I’ve forgotten about myself.

There have been times when I’ve been so wrapped up in doing something for someone, or so worried about pleasing someone, or focusing solely on them that that task or that person becomes my main focus in life. I’ve put my love in people, before putting it in myself. And this should never be the case.

Your main focus every day should only be yourself. You are your own first priority.

The statement, “I’m going to focus on myself for a while”, seems cliché I know, but it is actually so much more important than people realize. If you aren’t focusing on yourself, loving yourself, and taking care of yourself who else will? No one else has the power to care for you as deeply as you can care for yourself. You just have to realize that.

I’ve done so much soul searching lately and have only come to find that I am the one in charge of my own happiness, I am the one in charge of my actions, I am the one in charge of my thoughts and feelings. I am. Every decision that’s made in my life results from a choice that I made, and no one else can make those choices for me.

You should never give that personal power away to people because when you put others before yourself, that gives them the power to put others before you.

Do the things that you want to do. Go out and treat yourself to ice cream, or a new manicure, if you want to. Go with your group of girlfriends to see the newest Nicholas Sparks movie and cry your eyes out, if you want to. Stay up till 3 am studying for a test you are really worried about, if you want to. Go to the gym instead of going out to dinner, if you want to.

Do the things that you personally love to do, the things that make you happy, and the things that help benefit yourself and the person you are because this personal investment can go along way, and it can teach you a lot of things about yourself that you haven’t realized yet.

My deep care for others is one of the things I love about myself, and I take pride in it. But, the deep care I am now figuring out that I have for myself too, has only opened doors for me, never closed them.

First, be open to a life of loving yourself, and then be open to sharing that love and care with others. Because how will someone ever love you, if you don't even love yourself?

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