Growing up without a mom, whether it be due to addiction, death or just absence, is one of the hardest things a girl can go through.
Moms are known to be more gentle, understanding and emotional than most fathers. They do have that magic touch that seems to tie everything back together. There is nothing like a mother´s love.
No matter the age you lost your mom, whether physically, mentally or both, it is heart breaking. There become so many unanswered questions, to the point where you find yourself Googling all the “what if's” and “how to's” because you are too embarrassed to ask someone else.
Little girls love dressing up in pink dresses. However, when some are raised strictly by a father, they settle for overalls and a baseball cap. These dress up clothes turn into prom dresses. Prom is that time when a girl wants to be treated like a princess while having her number one by her side. Then comes the wedding day, this is a proud moment for any girl to share with her mother. The girl notices the empty spot in the church, even while no one else does.
Nobody can replace the feeling that a mother brings to her daughter. Some girls do not even know what it feels like to have a mother because she was never in the picture, or was gone too soon to remember. A daughter will always feel that void and emptiness, even when everyone tells her everything is going to be all right. When you don't have a mom, sometimes you feel as if you missed most of the important moments, or that you are not living a normal life.
Oh my, let's not even talk about the awkward body changes a girl goes through, or the things that she starts to need. It’s all just down right red face ready to happy; especially when you have to go to your father. Getting your period is the most shocking and confusing natural process to happen to any girl. Dads just love going to the store to find you the right pad or tampon… Not. Bra shopping ends up being the cheapest and least padded bras around. The bra could either end up being two sizes too big, or you could still be wearing a training bra at 16. Falling behind in the make-up and fashion department is bound to happen. Going to the barber shop rather than the salon is something that occurs probably until the age of 17, until an aunt or friend's mom takes you.
Personally, it hits me in the gut whenever I see mothers and daughters together. Moms and their daughters laughing, shopping, going on trips and going to the salon together. This makes me melancholy, then I remember all the other moms that are in my life.
Growing up, for dance recitals, my dad was the only one that was given a "dad pass." I had to go to my friends house to get my hair and make-up done for dance. I thank Lacy and her mom for being there when I couldn't put on my fake eye lashes, Ms. Lynn and Lyndsey for taking me shopping more than I can remember, Beth for being my emotional supporter who I call everyday, Kim-e for showing me how to grow into myself, Momma Tammy for greeting me in her house every weekend and crashing with Kelsie, and Veronica, for being abiding by the older sister rule and turning into a mother. My "mom" role has been broken up about 25 times, and I would not have had it any other way. So many people have been willing to take me in as their own.
To the girls who don't have their mom, it will be okay. We all have our days of sadness, but just remember, there's many moms out there to help us.
