To The Friends I Feel Like I'm Losing, I'll Always Be Here

To The Friends I Feel Like I'm Losing, I'll Always Be Here

Sometimes it feels like we're losing each other, but I hope you know I'm always around.


Sometimes I feel like I'm losing everyone around me, and I'm not sure if it's because I feel really sad and alone sometimes, or if it's because of the period I'm at in my life.

All of my friends seem to be moving on with their lives, as if they have it so easy, and I feel stuck. I feel like I can't even tell my friends the new and exciting things in my life anymore because I always feel pushed to the side. Sometimes I have to remind myself that I'm just as important, and I don't need anyone else to feel excited for me to feel excited for myself.

It's hard for me to relate to other people that are my age sometimes, and it makes me feel like something is wrong with me. I don't care about partying, or who hooked up with who, or any other drama. I don't care about other people's classes, or how hard work was that day or anything that isn't going to be an actual problem in the future. Lately, it's been hard to care for myself, and with car issues, my own classes and jobs, and the overwhelming amount of health issues I've been dealing with lately, it's really hard to try to care about problems that seem so minimal. I know everyone has their own problems, but when I can barely deal with my own, it's hard to be there for other people. Sometimes I just wish that people would ask to vent or dump their problems on you before they went ahead and did it, so they would know what mental state I was in. I don't want to be an insensitive asshole, but when you don't check in first, that makes you the insensitive asshole.

But I am. I want my friends to know I'll always care, but it's hard for me to show it, and sometimes I need them to know that I'm also working through stuff that no one really understands right now.

I want my friends that are in relationships to know that I am happy for them, and I'm okay when they reschedule plans with me to spend time with their significant others, but I don't want to hear weird jokes about me being the single friend or weird low-blows about my commitment issues that everyone wants to pass off as jokes. I don't need anyone in my life to make me feel happy, and it makes me uncomfortable that you have that mindset. I'm your friend and all, but don't pull me into that weird shit.

Things change as we get older, and I'm okay with that. I know I'm going to lose friends, in more than one way, and that's just life. But to the friends I know will always be my friends, I'm here for you and your problems even when I'm working through my own. Life seems hard, and life gets hard, but don't ever think you have to go through it alone.

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Jussie Smollett, If You Wanted To Advance Your Career, Staging A Hate Crime Was Not The Way To Do It

You should strive to be known for your career instead of creating controversy.


On January 29, Jussie Smollett made a call to the Chicago Police Department and reported that he had been the victim of a hate crime by two men wearing MAGA hats, shouting slurs at him and that "This is MAGA country", throwing bleach on him, and performing a mock lynching on him. The police found him in his apartment with a noose tied around his neck.

However, after much investigating on the part of the Chicago Police Department, it has been revealed that Jussie Smollett hired two brothers to perform the attack on him.

He organized the attack, as well as mailing himself hate letters because he was "dissatisfied with his salary" on the television show "Empire" and trying to boost his publicity. Smollett turned himself over to the Chicago Police Department on Thursday morning.

Smollett's actions are very unusual and disrespectful, to say the least. It's very strange that he would willingly subject himself to the acts which he claims to hate. When you take a step back and look at the situation through an objective lens, this is too extreme to handle a disagreement over a lower salary. Committing felonies is not the way to get a point across. Smollett hurt not only himself but also the two people he hired to perform the hate crime. He caused more damage than he probably intended to cause for everyone involved.

In addition to all that, he greatly disrespected the Chicago Police Department.

Chicago has a higher crime rate than the average rate in the US, which puts a huge strain on their police department. The superintendent of the Chicago Police Department said in a press conference Thursday morning that he was saddened that this took away attention from the real gun crimes which are affecting innocent families in Chicago. The police essentially focused all their attention on an act which could have been prevented if Smollett had simply been willing to communicate with people with whom he works on "Empire". They really and truly should have focused on innocent people who were victims of very real crimes.

Staging a hate crime is no way to advance a person's career. It simply desensitizes people to the reality that hate crimes do indeed happen.

The world is an imperfect place, so things like that, unfortunately, still happen. However, organizing a fake one only causes people to be skeptical whenever one occurs.

When people hear about a hate crime happening on the news, now there's a chance that they will wonder, "Was this staged? Or did it really happen?" This could lead to people disregarding hate crime claims in the future, thus potentially causing people who suffered through them to not get the help they need.

There are so many other ways to make a name for yourself, ways that don't involve violence. You don't need to commit felonies and pull other people into these actions in order to make a point. I genuinely wish Jussie Smollett had thought his actions through more and decided to not jump to extremes to get what he wanted. He could have gained much more positive publicity that way.

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Poetry On Odyssey: Wild Flower

A wild flower bloomed. Growing in all the places you never expected. I surprise you and bring beauty to the ugliest places.


Wild Flower

Wild Flower I wish there was a book, a way to teach me to fall out of love with you. To help me erase the toxic memories and my extreme crys. How do I not run back, I lack the urge to forget us, you.

Plans gone to Disintegrate the same as what was you and me. Going through pictures of good times we weren't picture perfect, we weren't worth the picture still.

I deserved so much better but I was unable to see the deep sea of sorrow and pain and lies and let me not forget the excuses and repetitive I'm sorries and constant pathetic excuses you drowned me in. You were my anchor and so was your baggage. I carried it all, you carelessly took it for granted.

I fell into my own personal sunken place. You cast a spell I was unable to fall from, I have seen you. I see you for who you are and I was mute at the time. You swept me off my feet and I fell on my face.

How pitiful of both of us. Shame on us for this waste of time. Lessons learned but bridges burned. This path we can't cross. This book we have to keep closed.

Hurt people, hurt people. At least that's what they say, I'm hurt past words description something so deep that self-love, optimism, and positivity can't fix. I hurt me, allowing this negative energy.

You never loved me for more than my curves and island of intimacy initially, in denial of the damaging denting you did to me. You left me in a darkness, much more than the sunken place. I was sinking though, I fell and became lost in the deception.

Deep in optimism that this was all just a phase, I waited and waited, hoping that glimmer would return to your eyes only in return did I see stale stares and the stars never aligned in our favor. I'm a galaxy but to you, I was only the moon.

Dark and ever changing through stages. I'm stuck as I see myself slowly drift, fading away. Man on the moon, alone and afraid. Exploring this new atmosphere, floating through space. Just existing missing the steady ground.

Why did you drag me through the dirt, even though that was the best gift you gave me. I never realized but I wasn't buried from your decisions but only planted. You planted the seed to the new me. Finally, I sprouted my roots and grounded myself.

I submerged from the ground, a wildflower bloomed. Growing in all the places you never expected. I surprise you and bring beauty to the ugliest places. My bright color pops a bright yellow on a black canvas.

I'm so strong no winds can sway me. Like a tree, I stand strong with beautiful tough skin. My layers show wisdom, years of experience.

I never let you define me, I made my own definition. A beauty who's a beast, both yin and yang. She is everything you ever wanted to be.


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