Every once in a while I wonder how you are doing. You were such a big part of my life, then you decided to walk out like I never even mattered. There are days where you cross my mind, and I just want to talk to you so badly. I want to stay up and have our late night talks, but you probably do that with your new best friend now because you have happily replaced me. I would drive to your house if I thought it would change anything, but I know it won’t.
You never made time to hang out with me, and don’t even start to say that “you are too busy.” If people are actually important to you, you make time. With me going to classes all day and then work, I still made time. Before everything got so complicated, you would make time to hang out with me. It actually wouldn’t be making time, it would just be expected for us to go to each others’ houses on the weekends and spend every spare second that we could together. Thanksgiving, Christmases. All of them were spent together. Then everything changed, and it was like I was forgotten.
My heart shattered when I realized that I had lost you. I knew that there was no going back to the way things were because you had broken all of my trust. You changed everything that we knew and turned it into something mangled and broken. The saddest part? You didn’t even notice it. When I came to you after two weeks of not talking and started bawling, you didn’t even realize that we had grown apart. We used to notice everything about each other, we used to be able to tell when the other person was hurting or upset. When I came to you, you were so shocked. You said you were so sorry, and you promised to do better so I gave you another chance. My bad there. We went right back to not talking.
A part of me will always secretly care about you. I’ll always be rooting you on from the distance you put between us. But I can’t go back and forth anymore. It hurts too bad. I hope that you have made the right choices. And I hope everything goes well for you in your life. I truly do, and I hope you don’t regret choosing her over me because there is no going back now.
“I think it’s time I let you go. And that’s so hard to do because some part of me with always love you for the rest of my life. But the daydreaming, this running in place, it’s not healthy. So this is me, cutting the cord. This is me doing what I should have done months ago: Saying goodbye.”
