I was so used to living in the single life.
Watching everyone go on dates, posting about their boy on Instagram or really any kind of social media, and just the constant smile that was on their face. I used to ask myself why that wasn't me that could be smiling up at someone I liked. I then went through that stage long enough that I always thought I was going to live in the single realm.
I was starting to not mind being where I was, I was happy to just be loving myself.
But then someone came. I was unsure at first because the other times I had had boys break my heart because they were completely clueless about what truly being with someone meant. It wasn't about running around to all of their friends, telling them that they were no longer single.
It wasn't about rushing things along to make our relationship make what other people had. And it wasn't about taking advantage of someone else, mentally or physically. I had almost lost the hope of finding the guy that wasn't there for all of those things. He was there for me, there for my well being and seeing past all of the superficial things that could get in the way in an unhealthy relationship.
I had this friend that would always tell me that the right one would keep knocking on the door that I had so tightly shut. Opening that door meant opening myself up to another guy and all of the things that could keep you up at night if someone tried to destroy. It was a terrifying thought to let someone back in because I wasn't about the repeat history again.
But you came along. You kept knocking on my door without me even knowing it. We became best friends first, by telling each other everything and getting advice from one another. It wasn't until one day that we both woke up day and realized what everything had turned into.
It that was the first, real relationship that I felt so comfortable in my own skin. It was easy to trust you with all those things that I had locked away behind that door that I thought I wouldn't open for a very long time.
I thank my lucky stars each day that you were always there knocking on my door. I have never been in love with someone before, so I don't really know what this feeling is. I have always heard about it in movies and heard other people talking about it. But experiencing it is a whole new ballgame. And though I haven't officially said this to you yet, I think I will be able to here in the future.
I have said it before to guys in the past but I was just saying it, they were just empty words. But I know this time, whenever that time may be, it's going to be the real thing.