Whenever I think of a prime example of a toxic relationship, I instantly think of "Emily" from the TV show Friends. Emily and Ross met and fell in love which sounds like a happy ending, but it was anything but a happy ending. Emily is a controlling, manipulative, micromanaging person over Ross. She loved getting her way, taking control of his life, and his friend group (which meant shutting Rachel out).

Ross moved away from family and friends to make Emily happy and cutting out one of his best friends. Emily had a major effect on everyone, not just Ross. Emily caused tension and drama among a friend group. Her ability to squeeze in and make everyone miserable is the definition of a toxic relationship. While Ross did owe her something because he did say the wrong name at his and Emily's wedding, he was willing to put everything below Emily. He made a comment to Joey that "marriage is hard and is about compromise, " but it was him giving Emily what she wants.

Every single person has an "Emily" in the friend group. It is hard to deal with an Emily because the "Ross" just wants to make her happy. It is hard to convince them that they will not only be just as happy without that person in their life but happier. Here is an open letter to anyone who keeps a toxic person around.

Dear friend,

Before I speak about someone in your life, I need you to know that I care an enormous amount of you. You are someone that I would pick up the phone for at all hours of the night and be there for you in any way I can.

I can not, however, keep my cool about the toxic relationship that you have in your life.

This person controls your every move. You are afraid to let them go because of what they might do to themselves. I need you to know, that you can lead a horse to water but you can not force it to drink water. As cliche as that is, it rings very true. You can lead a person down a good path and keep them on the straight and narrow, but it is ultimately their choice to stay on that path. They need to find their intrinsic motivation to do well in school, do well at work, and contribute to their family. You can tell them to drink in moderation, but it is their decision as to how many shots they want to take. You may try to keep them clean from drugs, but it is their choice to put the joint down. You are not theirs to save. You are their's to help, but you can never save someone.

This person lights up your phone screen with face time calls, text messages, regular phone calls, Snapchats, etc. It is incredibly unhealthy to have such a co-dependent relationship. When you feel responsible for keeping them happy and motivated because they will go off the deep end, it is time-consuming, mentally draining, and everything in between. You need to live your life and take care of yourself. When you are hanging out with friends, you shouldn't have to keep sending her to voicemail or canceling the face time call. When your friends need you for a hug, they should be able to get one without feeling the vibration from your phone. It annoys the actual heck out of everyone because they know it's that person and they are tired of them being your life. Your friends and family always ask why you keep them around; maybe it is time to start realizing we are doing this to help you. We are not trying to keep this person out of your life to spite you, but help you. Having someone this toxic and micromanaging in your life does nothing but create unnecessary drama and tension.

I love you, friend. I speak my mind when it needs to be heard. I only say these things because toxic people never leave. They also never change. They can be doing good for weeks, even months. But once they feel like they have pleased you, they can fall back so far to the point where they are so intoxicated they can't remember what happened the night beforehand. The tricky thing about toxic people is that they are so completely dependent on others that they actually won't do anything to help themselves unless they have a guiding hand.

I never liked this toxic person from the start. You can try and tell me how much she is changed, but at the end of the day, she will always be the crazy party girl that you have always been trying to help.

Love, a concerned friend.

Having an "Emily" is never easy. Having a "Ross" that is headed over heels for "Emily" (and they can't even point out why they like her so much) is a nuisance to deal with. You as a good friend need to be the supporter with your friend, but never be afraid to speak your mind against a toxic relationship. They are easy to get rid of at the start, but incredibly difficult when they are completely and wholly dependent on someone else for every decision and action. Never be afraid to speak out because, at the end of the day, that toxic person needs to leave, no matter how much your friend may not want to hear it. They will one day thank you for having tough love with you because their life will be so much better once they have let the "Emily" go.