New love is hard to balance between working, spending time with family, going to school, and to top it all off you have to spend time with your friends too. You're just adding a whole other level to your life. It's not meant to be stressful but sometimes it turns out that way when it's piled on top of everything else in your life. Falling in love with someone is supposed to be one of the greatest feelings when you're young but when you're doing it make sure your eyes are open to how you're treating other people.
Don't get me wrong I'm happy you're finally happy, it's been a long time coming. You've been through so much that it's almost hard to believe sometimes. You deserve a man who's going to love you through every freakout and even when you haven't eaten yet and are a complete you-know-what. I love seeing you smile and I love seeing the sparkle in your eye when you see his name on your phone but I can't help but feel left in the dust.
Through every guy that didn't work out or treated you like you were nothing I was there. I picked up the pieces and tried my best to make everything okay even though I knew you just had to cry it out. And when those tears did come I was the one that held you tight (even though I don't like to be that close to anyone, and you know that) and I'll be the one to do it again if things don't work out here. I know that life is taking us on completely different paths as of late with work, school, and me being almost three hours away and yes that is part of the problem but I feel like I'm the only one trying. I wanna hear about your first day of classes or for you to call me on your way from work like you always used to, but I feel like I'm bothering you.
It breaks my heart to see you distancing yourself from me, whether intentionally or unintentionally. And I hope reading this you see how I feel. I don't expect you to understand what I'm going through or my reasoning behind this piece but I hope you do have time to sit down and think about the way things have changed and how I've been pushed to the side.
I love you, always.
